Often children, mere infants, are accidently cut and end up bleeding and enduring unimaginable pain when their parents, for purely cosmetic reasons, carve off parts of their own children's bodies. These so-called parents are untrained in this delicate invasive procedure. They think they can just snip off the nails from these Infanto-Americans' toes and thumbs and fingers just because they're their parents and they "own" them. There is NO VALID MEDICAL reason why the nails should be trimmed. Human beings survived untold millennia without nail clippers. The practic is unnatural. It's purely a cultural form of ritualized abuse. Look, once they're grown up and can make their own lifestyle choices, I say let them do whatever they want with their bodies, except smoke cigarettes. But while they're young, they need our protection. Please, won't someone think of the children? If Obama does not crack down on this hideous practice, I will vote for Mitt Romney in protest. And if Mitt Romney wins by one vote, I will move to Canada.

Right fucking now!