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All of the above are a questionable way to sell any product. But when all of the above are a way to sell “the news” – or what passes for “the news” in today’s mainstream media – we’re in trouble as a nation.

Give me the facts – “the news” – without the hype, the opinion of people whose opinions I don’t want nor need, a recounting of the events of the day absent the take, the spin, the hype, the feigned outrage, the foregone conclusion, the implied, the inferred, the behind-the-scenes story, the rumour, the Twitter, the Magic Board, the blackboard, the Etch-a-Sketch summation of who said what and when, and why I should be interested in the first instance.

In exchange for the facts – devoid of fancy, fabrication, and furbelows – I might just tune-in.

Otherwise, no deal.

Got it?

Wish you would.

I’m not holding my breath. And neither is a nation.

Just sayin’.

Caught Between a Rock and a Hardy-Har-Har Place: Tom Tancredo’s address at the Teabagger’s (LOL!) Convention included a timely admonition that citizens should be required to pass civics and literacy tests before being allowed to vote.

Apparently Mister I Pity the Fool Who Can Think! T(ea) doesn’t realize that the very people he was speaking to are those who, under his proposal, wouldn’t be permitted to vote at all. I can only assume that in his zeal for said voter reform, he failed to see the No Amnety, Inglich as Offical Languge, Gov’t Hands-Off my Medicade signs this particular audience is famous for.

One question remains: Is Mr. Tancredo for or against the Pubic Option?

Beyond the Palin Let’s face it, folks. There’s no one on earth who makes you want to simultaneously yell STFU and please keep talking! like Sarah Palin. The eagle-eyed Sarah can see Russia, but apparently can’t see the buildings that have been erected on her own property – the ones she hasn’t paid property taxes on.

Sarah’s latest idiocy-de-jour is a call for the firing of Rahm Emmanuel for using the word “retarded” – a word she finds offensive and loathsome when uttered by a Democrat. But when screeched by the likes of Rush Limbaugh – well, not so much.

My only concern here is who’s minding the store. Should Putin rear his ugly head above Alaska, who will protect us now that Sarah is busy elsewhere?

Note to Putin: Should you decide to invade the US by way of Alaska, your forces can always hide out in one of Sarah’s cabins – apparently even she doesn’t know they’re there.

From the You-Can’t-Make-This-Shit Up Department: According to a recent article by Karl Rove, “In truth, the president met with congressional Republicans to talk about the stimulus package … What occurred was a photo-op, not an exchange of ideas. Democrats at both ends of Pennsylvania Avenue were scornful of Republican input.”

Well, right off the top, you gotta figure that when Rove starts a sentence with “in truth”, it’s time to wrap yourself in plastic sheeting and duct tape, so as to prepare for yet another landslide of BS from a man who wouldn’t recognize “the truth” if it landed on an aircraft carrier under a Mission Accomplished! banner, smirking and heh-hehing, its down-under junk prominently displayed for all the world to see.

Said Karl: “Framed as an opportunity for the president to hear from the other side, Mr. Obama's real aim was to portray Republicans as obstructionist and boost his own public standing in the process.”

Note to Karl: An “exchange of ideas” requires actual ideas on both sides, and the GOP’s idea – which consists wholly of let’s-not-agree-with-anything-Obama-says – doesn’t quite cut it. While it’s truly admirable of you to credit Obama with portraying Republicans as obstructionists, the real credit belongs to the Republicans themselves – who require little help in this regard.

(Almost) as Eye-Poppin’ as a photo of Michele Bachman (Turnip-Head in Overdrive): Early results from a Daily Kos/Research 2000 survey beg a response from the other side of the aisle, to wit:

63% of Republicans think Obama is a socialist.

That number is comprised of 42% who admittedly don’t know what a “socialist” is, and 21% who think it means the Obamas attend way too many parties.

Only 42% believe Obama was born in the United States.

Only forty-two percent of Democrats believe that Dick Cheney was ever born at all, as opposed to being hatched in a test-tube, the result of a scientific experiment gone terribly awry.

53% think Sarah Palin is more qualified than Obama to be president.

53% also think Conan-Leno is a small country in the Middle East – and are concerned that the current skirmishes there will escalate into the use of nukular weapons.

23% want to secede from the United States.

An overwhelming majority of the citizenry are more than willing to give them a lift to the airport.

73% think gay people should not be allowed to teach in public schools.

Seventy-three percent of gay people believe that Republicans are too stupid to be taught anything – especially why NOT to vote for Republicans.

31% want contraception to be outlawed.

Good idea – because thirty-one percent of the country apparently believe there just isn’t enough stooopid to go around. If the stooopid aren’t forced to procreate, just where will the future GOP base come from?

39% of Republicans want President Obama to be impeached.

Surprisingly, more than thirty-nine percent of Democrats agree that a president who invades a foreign nation based on lies about WMDs, who allows an American city to drown while he’s on vacation, who advocates the use of torture to – oops! Sorry, wrong president ………………. nevermind.

Self-styled investigative journalist James “Dude, Where’s My Credentials?” O’Keefe has now offered more reasons for being in Senator Mary Landrieu’s office than the average tenth-grader has for not handing in his homework assignment. While his “reasons” have been many, “The dog ate my press pass” still tops the list as of this writing.

In a related story, Fox-TV announced the addition of a new reality series, ”The Dog Ate My Journalism Credentials”, to its roster of shows skedded to air in November 2010. Being as the series could potentially include the entire news staff of CNN, NBC, CBS, ABC – and Fox-NEWS as “The Beaver” – auditions for a place on the program threaten to rival those of “American Idol”. Good luck to all of the contestants – and may the best media whore win!

Well, it’s certainly been an interesting week.

The Wonder Gears: Early in the week, TDS featured a pricelessly funny segment comparing Obama to Wonder Years character Kevin Arnold, standing by helplessly as a station wagon drives off, leaving him in the dust. While I admit to being a Jon Stewart fan (okay, a fall-on-my-knees adorer), I think he missed the mark on this one.

That isn’t Obama’s car the GOP won’t let him into; it’s the citizenry’s vehicle – you know, the one that’s supposed to take us from Point A to Point B, from recession to recovery, from insurance company extortion to actual healthcare coverage, etc. But given the further events of the week, it was made obvious that the President knows a car that’s about to run out of gas midway through an ill-advised joy ride – and was about to let the populace know exactly who was more than happy to leave who on the side of the road.

The SOTU Address was delivered with Obama’s usual eloquence and style, along with a clear message that you fuck with the neither-rain-nor-sleet-nor-GOP-obstructionist-bullshit-will-stop-me postman at your own peril. Despite the fact that the Republicans wanted to refuse delivery – all having that no such number, no such zone look on their faces – the President wasn’t about to step away from the podium until the signed, sealed, delivered receipt was firmly shoved up their collective butts mailboxes.

While Obama continues to play chess, the GOP continues to demonstrate that tiddly-winks are beyond their skill set – and besides, nonny-nonny, they ain’t playing at all. And if there was any doubt about the matter, the American public was educated, in no uncertain terms, by the Smartest Guy in the Room (and surrounding environs, including the universe as we know it) on Wednesday night. Smirkless and heh-heh-less, President Smackdown was generous with handing out the rope – lest the Republicans not already have enough to hang themselves.

Smile! You’re On Candid Camera! This week’s episode featured John McCain mouthing the words “oh, yeah, blame Bush”, as the President talked about the mess he’d inherited before he even walked through the door. Honestly, it gave me a bit of hope for the aging senator’s state of mind. If he can own-up (intended or otherwise) to how we got where we are and who’s to blame, maybe – just maybe – he’s not so senile after all.

My favorite segment was, of course, Justice Alito’s bobble-headed reaction to the President’s comments on the recent SCOTUS decision confirming that corporations are people, too, god-damn it!. Too bad he didn’t have the foresight to have Mrs. Alito seated behind him within camera range, turning on the waterworks – just in time to qualify for an Emmy in the Nancy Kerrigan Cry-Alike category.

“Sarah, Sarah, no time is the right time for goodbye …” Actually, the right time for goodbye was pretty much contemporaneous with the first time you said hello. But I won’t debate the point here and now – while you’re busy trying to figure out what “contemporaneous” means. (Hint: It’s not the name of the suburb between North Korea and South Korea, just in case you were wonderin’.)

No SOTU is newsworthy until Sarah Palin weighs-in – and what more appropriate venue could there be for her to express her opinion than the political juggernaut that is FaceBook. Along with Sean D’s latest rant about his pizza being delivered cold and sans anchovies, and Mikey M’s FB wall photo montage of his most recent hangover, Sarah’s contribution to the must read! post-of-the-week was jam-packed with the usual nonsense we’ve all come to know her by. Unfortunately, Sarah forgot to tell whoever wrote the piece she passed off as her own that using complete sentences, properly paragraphed and punctuated, would be a dead giveaway that the response was written by someone (anyone) other than the Wasilla Thriller.

Note to Sarah: Never send a literate person to do your writing job. You’ll get caught every time.

CNN – The Most Trusted Name in Muse tried desperately to overtake FOX-News in the area of newsotainment yet again this week, with their après-SOTU coverage – not even close, no cigar.

The Best Political Team on TV (or is it the Best Li’l Whorehouse – I admit to being confused between the two) now bears a striking resemblance to Saturday morning kids’ shows – perhaps in an effort to appeal to its target audience.

We have John “Mr. Wizard” King and his Magic Board, David “Captain Midnight” Gergen (who is surely shilling a decoder ring that deciphers whatever the fuck it is he’s saying), and Miss Mary (Matlin) who wants to edumacate the populace like Miss Frances of Ding-Dong School once did – the only difference being that Dr. Frances Horwich held a doctorate in education, while Miss Mary is just a ding-dong, a similarity that CNN apparently feels is close enough to warrant the awarding of that still just-out-of-reach cigar.

Wolf (former Santa’s reindeer) Blitzer was quick to announce that CNN would be fact-checking the representations Obama made in his SOTU address. You’ve got to figure it will be months before their final report is available, as the CNN staff will first have to attend a lengthy seminar series on What is a “fact”, and how to report one when you stumble across it.

Note to CNN: If you’re going to quote Twitter posts as part of your “news” coverage, you might want to give the Twitterers a heads-up so they can tune-in and see themselves referred to on national TV – God knows they’re too savvy about news to be watching CNN otherwise. In addition, if you’re going to stay with this entertainment-as-news-coverage concept, I’d much prefer Senor Wences or that guy who could simultaneously spin ten plates atop eight-foot poles. They were at least worth watching.

But Wait – There’s More! The GOP-TV network ended its viewing week with Obama’s Q-and-A session with Republicans. I’m not saying the boys on the other side of the aisle bent over and set themselves up for a well-deserved spanking at every turn – but if the theme music for the next session isn’t “(Lookin’ Like a Fool) With Your Pants on the Ground”, some wanna-be marketing genius will have passed up the opportunity of a lifetime.

While there are dozens of epithets being thrown at those of us who still support the Democratic Party and President Obama – i.e. Kool-aide drinkers, blind loyalists, lock-stepping-marchers, etc. – the one that baffles me is the term “Obama apologists”.

The term implies that (a) we perceive Obama to have acted in a way that requires an apology – which we don’t – and (b) that the President himself owes some kind of apology to those who disagree with his conduct, his policies, his behaviour – which he doesn’t.

The man is doing what he was “hired” to do by the citizenry, i.e. to deal with the tasks at-hand based on his best judgment of how they can best be dealt with, given the opposition from the other side of the aisle, the obstacles strewn in his path by those who desire his tenure in office to be perceived as a failure, the “warring factions” who, on every side of any number of issues, believe their way is the only way.

Barack Obama wasn’t elected to do the bidding of each individual who voted for him; he was elected to do what he feels is in the best interest of the nation as a whole.

Don’t agree with him? Fine. Pissed off at him? You’re more than free to say so. But if you think you are owed an apology every time this president does something contrary to what you want – well, don’t hold your breath. Because you’re not. And those who support his presidency don’t owe you an apology either.

I believe strongly in the goals and tenets of the Democratic party, and I apologize to no one for holding that belief – nor do I apologize for this president, nor anyone else who I perceive to be doing the best job they can in moving the nation forward towards certain ideals becoming a reality.

Of course, there are those who don’t believe that the President IS moving the nation forward, and they are perfectly within their rights to say so. However, they should be aware that not everyone agrees with them – and those who don’t agree with them don’t owe them an apology for holding a different view, any more than they owe anyone an apology for their views.

I respect those who say: “I will fight for positive change, encouraged by my faith in this president.” That is, IMHO, a valid position.

I also respect those who say: “I will fight for positive change, despite my lack of faith in this president,” which is an equally valid stance.

What I have NO respect for is those who say: “My only interest is in nay-saying, being disruptive, instigating in-fighting, inciting divisiveness among people whose goals are the same (despite their differences as to the best way to achieve them), diminishing the power of the Democratic Party by encouraging the view that the Party is comprised of liars, corporatist sell-outs and ne’er do wells who are working in concert to undermine everything the vast majority of Democratic voters are working to achieve, encouraging a split in the Party – thereby increasing the chances of the GOP in future elections, so that I can whine-and-complain, as I’ve a wont to do.”

It is, in my humble opinion, the latter group – and only that group – who owe an apology to all concerned.

If you are currently a Norquist apologist, a splitting-the-Democrats-because-a-third-party-is-the-only-solution-even-though-it-strengthens-the-opposition apologist, a RW talking-points-when-they-serve-my-purpose apologist, an I campaigned for this guy and he OWES ME apologist, or – the most heinous of all – an I’m taking my marbles and going home apologist, please feel free to apologize.

But don’t expect those of us who still believe in a Democratic president and the Democratic Party to apologize for your discontent – nor your inability to see that if your only “solution” is to side with the enemy and take down the only viable party that stands in opposition to that enemy, you are part of the problem.

I stand behind this Party and this President. That may lead some of you to call me naive, ignorant, unaware of the facts, dumb-as-a-doorknob, easily-led, a sheeple, a kool-aide kid, a lock-stepper, a dreamer, a pie-in-the-sky optimist, an idealist - what the fuck ever.

And you are well within your rights to call me all of the above - valid or not - and then some.

But don't call me an apologist - because I apologize to NO ONE when it comes to my right to support a President I trust, or a Party whose aims I believe in.

Not now, not ever.

The significance of this piece lies in the fact that I want to write it. Whether it is read or not is of no consequence. It is the posting of it that is of significance to me, and for my own reasons.

I am a Democrat – and I stand by, with, and for this party at all times. I do so not only because I believe in its ideals, and find common cause with fellow party members, but because I have seen the alternative.

“I’m tired of always having to choose between the lesser of two evils when I vote.” Yeah, me too. But when it comes down to two choices – as it invariably does every four years – I’ll stick with the lesser (probably way lesser) of those two evils every time. Because I have seen the alternative.

“Sorry, but I can’t vote for someone I don’t believe in, even if he is a Democrat. It’s a matter of principle.” Well, "principles” are great. But if those principles lead you to refuse to participate, ignore the consequences to your country and fellow citizens, fail to vote for that lesser evil as a means to keep the greater evil out of power – well, quite frankly, your principles suck.

This time around, I supported Barack Obama’s candidacy because I believed in his intelligence, his compassion, and his determination. I got lucky – I got to support a man whose agenda, for the most part, meshed with mine. But the truth is, I would have supported him if he was only a fraction of what I perceived him to be, solely because he was the Democratic nominee. Because I have seen the alternative.

I knew going in that this man would, at times, disappoint me, anger me, fail me, not live up to my expectations – while at other times he would inspire me, invigorate me, encourage me to expand my expectations of myself as a citizen.

But I was willing – more than willing – to be outraged, overjoyed, frustrated, elated, infuriated and uplifted by a man who was capable of doing all of those things, and then some, who had a (D) after his name – because I’ve seen the alternative.

“So, my party right or wrong – right?” Yes, right. Because I have seen the alternative. I have seen what eight years – just a small moment in time in the great scheme of things – have done to a nation; eight years of the alternative. Don't want to go there again, but thanks for asking.

When you’ve lived as long as I have, you understand that change doesn’t happen overnight. You understand that it doesn’t come about on its own; it often requires your personal assistance. You understand that it’s not just the guy living at the fancy DC address who has obligations – you’ve got a few of your own.

“I’m not allowed to dissent, to speak up when I am dissatisfied?” Dissent is not only allowed – it is encouraged. But when dissent or disagreement causes you to threaten to walk away from the process rather than stand and fight for improvement, increased cohesiveness, taking a position of solidarity against the other side – well, maybe you haven’t taken a long, hard look at the alternative.

“It’s not fair to bring up the McCain-Palin ticket as an argument to my ‘I don’t like Obama and what he’s doing’ complaints.” In fact, it is. Because they were the alternative – and their ilk will be the alternative in future. These pairings of the ridiculous and the not-so-sublime are not some hypothetical, what-if-all-reason-fled examples of what the other side is offering – and will continue to offer. They are as real as the nose – the one so many of you are willing to cut off out of spite – on your face.

I come not to bury the Democratic party, but to praise it. Not because I believe all of its representatives are without fault – but because I believe that its representatives who are at fault can be eliminated, one by one, by US. Not because I agree with a Democratic president all the time, but because I know I will be in agreement with him more than I will ever be in agreement with the alternative.

If the eight years of BushCo did nothing else, it did accomplish this: the lines have been drawn, and it’s us or them. I’ve chosen my priority, picked a side. I’m with us, and I’m staying in.

And I’m staying in for a million reasons – some of monumental importance, others of trivial meaning, many of passing fancy and/or little/great consequence when all is said and done.

But mostly because I’ve seen the alternative. And the thought of such people being in power scares the shit out of me.

That's the truth. And in light of that truth, whatever your personal truth may be and whatever personal conduct it invokes, is forever devoid of persuasion.

I'm in - and I'm stayin' in.

When you stop listening to others, they stop listening to you.
When you stop speaking up, you stop being heard.
When you walk away, you’re irrelevant to the discussion.

You wonder how it was that you were ever on the same side in the first place.
You never liked him/her anyway – and you just remembered that.
You imagine what it would be like to be on the same side again.
You dream that you can be
You’re sure that you won’t be
And how you see it is how it ultimately plays out – violins or brass
A wedding march, a requiem mass
Take your places
Strike up the band

You can choose to ignore
Or merely to bore
Hide thread
Go to bed
In disgust – vow you’re gone
TS’d or out like a Drama Queen
Same dif
GBCW

We can throw our fists in the air
Throw our hands up in despair
Throw the baby out with the bathwater
Throw in the towel
Kick it to the curb
Good riddance to bad rubbish

How can everybody else be so wrong
When I know that I’m so right?

We can take a step forward
And move ahead
We can take a step backward
And learn from past mistakes
We can do both
Like walkin’ and chewin’ gum
There was a time
We knew how to do them simultaneously
Without breakin’ a sweat

We can protest
We can march
We can sign a petition
Rely on repetition
Or be bold
Take hold
Say something new – or pretend it’s LBN
When it’s really Op/Ed, at best

We can dare to speak to/for the people en masse
We can timidly, but decidedly, go about changing one heart/one mind
We can say, with determination, Yes, we can!
Or we can state, with resignation, Come to think of it – no, we can’t

We can divide ourselves into discussion groups
Insistent that WE know what’s best
What’s most important
What’s a priority – and what isn’t
Because WE know it all

We can obfuscate
Eliminate
Quote stats
Twist the facts
Italize, bold
Do as we’re told
Feign intelligence
Fake indifference
Decry, disappoint
Point fingers
Lay blame
Flame

We can talk to each other
And listen
Or not

But if we don’t learn to row this boat in the same direction, all hands on oars, we’re all going down.

TO: Mayor Russell Wiseman
Arlington, Tennessee

Sir:

I realize you are a busy man, so I will get right to the point.

You, sir, are an idiot.

I do not make that assertion without the necessary evidence to prove its accuracy. But having read your recent comments re President Obama’s address to the nation on Tuesday last, the evidence of your idiocy is incontrovertible.

“Ok, so, this is total crap, we sit the kids down to watch 'The Charlie Brown Christmas Special' and our muslim president is there, what a load.....try to convince me that wasn't done on purpose.”

Try to convince you it wasn’t on purpose? Wouldn’t dare to, sir. Anyone who honestly believes that the President, along with his consultants and staff, determined that pre-empting a showing of Charlie Brown’s Christmas Special should be uppermost in their minds is, undeniably, an idiot – and, as such, cannot be convinced of anything, including the fact that the Earth rotates around the Sun.

Perhaps you felt it was more personal an attack, that the President scheduled an announcement of grave import at a time specifically chosen to piss you off. I only raise that as a possibility given that idiots often have delusions of grandeur, along with an unhealthy dose of Palinoia (i.e. a state of advanced paranoia, the symptoms of which include a fearful belief that people of intelligence and common sense are part of a vast conspiracy whose only purpose in life is to find you ridiculous, and broadcast same to the world.)

President Barack Obama is a Christian, sir, not a “muslim” – and, by the way, “Muslim” should be spelled with a capital “M” – in the same way as one spells the names of other adherents of globally recognized faiths, e.g. Catholic, Lutheran, Mormon, etc.

While it has been amply demonstrated for decades now that those of your political persuasion are often incapable of grasping the intricacies of spelling and grammar, there are computer programs available to assist in this onerous task – Spellcheck being widely available and easily accessible.

“Ask the man if he believes that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and he will give you a 10 minute disertation about it....when the answer should simply be 'yes'...."

Oh, yes, I forgot! I am talking to someone who used the word “disertation” in an internet communication – apparently unaware that the red underlining of a word means it is misspelled. Again, sir, your idiocy is showing – you might want to look into that.

If you “asked the man” (and just a quick reminder here, that “man” is the President of the United States of America) if he believes that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, he, as a Christian (note the capital C), would undoubtedly respond that he does. And whether he responded in ten seconds, or ten minutes, or ten decades would be of no consequence – because it is a question you have no right to pose, and he has no obligation to respond to. That’s because the Constitution clearly sets out the separation of Church and State (you might want to read it sometime – or are you still waiting for the movie version?)

Undeterred by your already blatant idiocy, sir, you chose to continue:
"...you obama people need to move to a muslim country...oh wait, that's America....pitiful."

Do you think it “pitiful” that we, as a nation, have Muslim citizens?

Let me tell you what “pitiful” is, Your Idiocy. It is “pitiful” that people like yourself are elected to office, and that citizens actually support you. It is “pitiful” that people like Fred Phelps shield themselves from prosecution for hate crimes by hiding their bigotry behind a bastardization of what is in fact a faith that, once upon a time, was based on love, tolerance, and understanding.

It is “pitiful” that we have come to a point as a country where the question What would Jesus do? is now answered by saying that undoubtedly Jesus would promote prejudice and intolerance – along with a disdain for grammar and spelling.

Had I read your comments ten years ago, sir, I would have told you to STFU* with your lies. (And you can ask an aide what STFU means).

But under the present circumstances, knowing that your party is losing adherents at an alarming rate on a daily basis, I encourage you – nay, I urge you – along with your fellow Idiots, to just keep talkin’. Because every time you or one of your ilk open your mouths, another dozen – or hundred, or thousand – registered Republicans say, “I’m outta here,” loathe to be associated with the Idiotocracy that you, sir, represent.

As for your children who missed the Charlie Brown Christmas Special, might I suggest that you make amends by taking them to see Glen Beck’s A Christmas Sweater? I understand he can use the audience. It seems that being an Idiot just isn’t the draw you and your party were banking on.

Yours Most Sincerely,
NanceGreggs

My post last night was apparently taken by many as being aimed at those who oppose Obama’s decision to send more troops into Afghanistan. It was not.

I have been opposed to our presence in Afghanistan from the beginning, and disagree with the president’s decision.

That being said, I take responsibility for being misunderstood. As I have often stated, misinterpretation is most often the fault of the writer, not the reader. I wrote what I did in a blind rage at what I had been reading here yesterday afternoon and again last night. As a result, I was unclear in my intent – that is a reason, but certainly not an excuse. I should have been more precise in my words and my meaning.

I apologize to those who, mistaking my intent, thought I was insulting their anti-war stance, or their right to disagree with Obama’s position.

However, I owe no apology to those my piece was aimed at: those here who consistently use their every disagreement with Obama as an opportunity to demean and belittle a president who doesn’t conform, one hundred percent, to their idea of what should be done by a true Democrat, a true liberal, a true progressive, a true leader, as though they alone possess the political yardstick by which such things are to be measured.

Criticism of Obama’s policies, decisions, appointments, procedures, etc., should not be merely tolerated, but encouraged. I have never wavered from that stance. However, I fail to see name-calling and personal insults as criticism – because it is what it is: name-calling and personal insults. I have seen some defend such statements as merely being “constructive criticism” – but unless they believe they can insult Obama into seeing things their way, there is nothing constructive about it.

On the contrary – it is, IMHO, destructive.

The words and phrases I placed in italics in my OP – warmonger, sell-out, etc. were taken from postings that appeared on DU yesterday. Mindful of the rules against “calling out” specific DUers, I used their words as identifiers – stupidly assuming that everyone who read my post would recognize who I was aiming my vitriol at. I was sadly mistaken in that assumption.

Of late I have chosen to not open numerous DU threads, those I can immediately recognize by their titles and/or authors as yet another attack on our president or our party couched as “constructive criticism”, but that are in reality an invitation – nay, an encouragement – to whine and complain, and to see every Obama decision as being reflective of a man and a party whose every move is to be viewed with suspicion.

What set me off yesterday was reading threads about topics totally unrelated to Afghanistan and/or Obama, where certain parties weighed-in anyway with comments like, “Well, now that we know the president is a warmonger …,” anxious to get their point across whether it was completely off-topic or not.

DemocraticUnderground has been, for myself and many others, a refuge from the right-wing talking points we are bombarded with daily by that liberal media we keep hearing about. It is demoralizing to come here – once a place of sanctuary where people could debate, discuss and ultimately choose to agree or disagree – and see those same talking points trotted out and proffered as facts being deliberately ignored by KoolAid-drinking Obamabots, too imbued with idol-worship to know what’s really going on here, man.

As for statements about our party being the same as their party, or Obama being the same as Bush, I personally find that offensive beyond words on a site devoted to supporting Democratic ideals. And I cannot imagine anyone of good intent seeking to persuade anyone here to join in such thinking. Having survived eight years of BushCo, we have seen the differences between the parties and their respective agendas in no uncertain terms – and the impact on our nation as a consequence.

Our party may be, at any given time and dependent on its current representatives, merely the "lesser of two evils". But given the alternative, I'll stand behind that lesser evil every time.

Again I apologize to those DUers who – through my fault, not theirs – misread my motives or my intent.

I would also like to thank the many DUers who took the time to send PMs expressing their encouragement and support. I appreciate their thoughtfulness beyond measure.

Well, Obama did it – again. He has made yet another decision on behalf of the entire nation without doing what I want, or even bothering to text-message me and ask for my personal opinion.

Little did I know when I supported this man’s bid for the presidency that he wasn’t going to do everything my way.

Hey, I read the papers – and I read DU. I realized from the beginning that not everyone agrees with me – that there are Democrats out there who see things differently than I do; that there are far-leftists, centrists, middle-of-the-roaders, that there are people whose positions may momentarily shift from one end of the political spectrum to the other, based on the specific issue being discussed.

I also realized (albeit reluctantly) that once elected, Obama would be the president of all Americans, not just Democrats, and would govern accordingly.

But what I never foresaw was that he would seek advice, consult with trusted advisors, converse with those of experience and expertise, ponder the options and weigh them – and then NOT dismiss everything and everyone out-of-hand and defer to my opinion in the end.

The tragedy here is that it would have been so simple to just please all the people, all the time: those for a swift and complete withdrawal from Afghanistan and those for escalation; those for a bail-out of the banks and those against it; those who believe that Priority One for this administration is the environment – education – job creation – marriage equality – election reform – immigration policy – foreign policy – domestic policy – DADT – DOMA – poverty – homelessness – healthcare reform – financial oversight – gun control – national security, along with a complete overhaul of the FDA, the CIA, the PTA, the ATF, FEMA, the Secret Service, the Not-So-Secret Service, the use of tazers, the use of lasers, the closing of Gitmo and the opening of more Hooters franchises to ease the pain of the disenfranchised.

Quite frankly, I don’t understand (a) why all of these things have not already been addressed and resolved to my satisfaction, (b) why I am still waiting for my pony – and, most importantly, (c) why anyone’s agenda other than mine is even being considered.

But tonight, my eyes have been opened – and I at last see the light. The reason for all of the above not having been dealt with is due to the fact that Obama is a warmongering, rush-to-the-wrong-decision, Bush-light, trying-to-be-macho, smooth-talking ne’er do well who is so blatantly in the pocket of corporations, the right-wing, the Christian Fundamentalists, Big Oil, Big Pharma, Big Business – just another shoot-your-friends-in-the-fuckin’-face, promises-promises, new-boss-same-as-the-old-boss, do-nuthin’ politician doing what he deems to be politically correct while seeking higher office.*

(* All of the above MUST be true, because I read it right here on DU, that bastion of Democratic Party supporters.)

But most importantly, Barack has now amply demonstrated that he’s going to do what he thinks is right, without any regard for what I want.

(For my money, Obama’s most egregious sin tonight was invoking 9-11 – and the fact that this event prompted our involvement in Afghanistan is of no fuckin’ consequence, IMHO.)

For the eight years of the Bushco ™ Administration, I have listened to my fellow Democrats talk about how the Republicans always stand by their man, whether they agreed with him or not – how the GOP always manage to get their guys elected by sticking with the party they felt to be the lesser of two evils (uh, that “evil” would be us), and how they couldn’t be shaken in their resolve that their guy was always the better guy.

We laughed at them, because they’d drunk the Kool-Aid – something we refuse to do. But that was our strength, the fact that we didn’t drink the Kool-Aid and were free to disagree with our party and each other, but – like warring siblings ready to take on the neighborhood if someone dissed our own – we would close ranks and stand behind our guy, because WE believed that HE was the lesser of two evils – in fact, the lesser of many.

Well, that’s ALL over now. I ain’t buying into this “lesser of two evils” crapola, because the election process should offer me TWO distinct choices: The evil (GOP) guy and the guy who does everything I want.

Until I am offered THAT choice, I will stay home and NOT vote (thereby throwing my vote away and allowing the worse of two evils to prevail), or I will vote for an independent candidate (again thereby throwing my vote away and allowing the worse of two evils to prevail), or I will vote for my Party member but fail to support him when he disagrees with anything I say (thereby allowing the worse of two evils to have a really good shot at retaking control of my country in the next election.)

I, for one, believe that constructive criticism is the backbone of a citizenry’s responsibility. And what could be more constructive than labelling our own as a “warmonger” when he makes a decision we disagree with – or, more to the point, when he disagrees with ME?

Because, as we all know, it’s my world, and it’s all about ME.

And you thought it was all about you. Well, if you don’t agree with me one hundred percent of the time, you’re obviously an idiot.

(Tell me I don't need to add that "sarcasm" thingy, okay?)

All of this to say that I’m probably about to become the most unpopular poster on DU – evah!

After tonight, I no longer care. I’m just another one of those Barack Davidians, who believes that our guy is the best guy for the job – whether he agrees with me or not.

And I stand behind his dish.

It seems that along with the Colbert-coined phrase “truthiness”, another word should be added to our lexicon: “Newsiness”.

Definition: The recounting of events, as presented by the current crop of mainstream news broadcasters, that almost smacks of being accurate reportage of stories of import – only kinda sorta, not really, you’d almost think so, but …

No one could argue that what is passed off as the news these days is in any way wanting in terms of quantity. There’s plenty of it for those strong-of-stomach and weak-of-mind – a veritable cornucopia of endless blathering, available 24/7 for those prone to insomnia, those infamous couch-potatoes who will watch anything that purports to be “news” as they use their remote to round-the-horn one last time before falling asleep.

But quality? Oh, well, now you’re asking for something that you can’t hear, given that the background noise – a combination of the sound of the death knell of true journalism, along with the whirring of Walter Cronkite and Edward R. Murrow spinning endlessly in their graves – tends to obliterate any actual news reporting that might, albeit inadvertently, occur.

Not being a “TV journalist” myself, I’m not sure what awards system is in place for the recognition of excellence – or even above-average mediocrity – in today’s world. But if there is a statuette awarded for Accuracy in Reporting, it’s last recipient was undoubtedly a weatherman in Bumfuck, Montana, who announced at 5:17 a.m. on April 26, 2005, that Big Ed’s Fishful Thinking Emporium on Transit Road was having a spring sale on bait (which it actually was), thereby accidentally allowing a fact – (and without any accompanying editorializing about same) – to be sent out over the airwaves to be heard by the twelve Bumfuck residents who were tuned-in at the time.

Perhaps, by virtue of my not being aware of the criteria for such awards, I am ignorant of the categories in which present-day “journalists” compete. But I’m guessing they include Best Use of a Crowd Scene Meant to Mislead the Viewers, Creative Editing of an Interview (a.k.a. the “Out of Context” plaque), and the coveted Don’t Ask Me, I’m Just a Teleprompter Reader award for bubble-headedness deemed to be above and beyond the call of demonstrating one’s personal ignorance and stupidity for all the world to see.

Given the aforementioned, I just wanted to go on record as declaring the following to the powers-that-be who, for worse or even worser, control the news media…

I am not the least bit interested in what Dick/Liz or ANY Cheney, John McCain, Billy-Boy Kristol, David Frum, et al have to say about anything.

I am equally uninterested in how many people showed up at Sarah Palin’s most recent book-signing, what Levi Johnston has to say about that, or who will be wearing who at this year’s Teddy Awards.

If I want to be apprised as to whether this is the coldest/warmest November on record, I will GO TO THE ACTUAL STATISTICS – and not Sean Hannity’s mindless meandanderings on same.

If I actually wanted to know what was going on in politics, I wouldn’t – no, not in a million years, and then some – turn to CNN’s “Best Political Team” for the information I seek. Quite frankly, I’d be better off going to the Bumfuck, Montana, website and reading what Big Ed has to say on the topic.

Candy Crowley, Campbell Brown, Anderson Cooper, Bill O’Reilly, Wolf Blitzer – Geraldo Rivera (for Christ’s sake!) – these are the “journalists” whose opinion I should be listening to? Well, fuck me gently with a wire brush, but – well, I’d actually prefer being fucked with a wire brush than listen to these idiots proffer their “take” on anything more meaningful than my Aunt Camille’s lime-jello-with-caraway-seeds contribution to Thanksgiving dinner, and society as a whole.

If I felt an overwhelming desire for opinion along with my news, I would conduct an impromptu survey of my fellow subway-riders during rush hour – ya know, those people who are actually impacted by manufacturing plants closing their doors – rather than the airheads (all of whom are pulling down six-figure-a-year salaries or more) – who pervade my TV screen 24/7 and babble on and on, as though they know what it’s like to find a pink slip tucked inside your last pay envelope, as though they know how it feels to realize coverage of your life-or-death medical tests have been denied by your insurer, as though they know (or care) what’s going on in the real world beyond runaway brides, Angelina Jolie’s last rant, a saga about a boy-in-a-balloon, and how Obama is destroying American life as we know it – or once knew it, before airheads got access to the media.

Let’s get down to the fact of the matter – and we can deal with this quickly, because there is only one fact at play here: The news IS the news. It is a series of events, statements, occurrences and/or government and/or local actions that impact the lives of the citizenry. It is ideally presented to the public without editorializing, political bias, fabrication, trick-of-the-eye videotape splicing, non-facts being proferred as facts, statistics taken out of someone’s ass, “reliable sources” being Twittering twits and/or Facebook philosophers, AND the “opinions” of people who are long on microphones and studio time and short on even a modicum of integrity.

In short, if we actually wanted your opinion, we’d ask for it. And given the caliber of those offering their opinion, not to worry – we won’t be asking for it anytime soon.

“Are you talkin’ to ME? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me? Well I'm the only one here. Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?”

All I can say is that if you are indeed talking to me, you’re talking to someone who doesn’t give a flyin’ fuck what you have to say – and I’m hardly alone in that stance. I am MILLIONS strong in holding that opinion. And you’ve got – oh, yeah, Wolf Blitzer.

Well, as one real journalist once said, “Good night – and good luck.”

Sometimes the answer to a question is so simple, it somehow fails to be noticed and appreciated. People tend to over-analyze the most complicated aspects of a problem and, in so doing, fail to discern the obvious cause of the undesirable effect.

In my most humble opinion, the state we now find ourselves in – as a nation, and as global citizens – is simply matter of a lack of individual conscience.

I don’t know where our consciences have fled – or why they have been suppressed, ignored, or stomped out of existence. But the fact remains that if that part of ourselves that gives us pause to think about the impact of our actions on others, which in turn leads us to conduct ourselves accordingly, was still fully operational, we wouldn’t be where we are right now. And where we are is not a very good place.

If the CEO of a corporation who accepts millions of dollars in annual compensation had a conscience, he couldn’t sleep at night knowing his private jet, his yacht, his four private residences, and his child’s $250,000 Sweet Sixteen party meant that his hard-working employees were hardly scraping by.

If insurance adjustors who routinely dismiss healthcare claims submitted by the sick and liable-to-die without coverage had a conscience, they wouldn’t be able to apply a “DENIED” stamp to an application for life-saving treatment, and then go about their daily lives without so much as a second thought.

If bankers had a conscience, they wouldn’t talk their customers into taking on mortgages they can’t possibly afford, or loan obligations they have no hope of ever satisfying, nor extricating themselves from.

If credit card employees had a conscience, they wouldn’t rope unsuspecting consumers into believing that the payment arrangements and interest rates they’ve agreed to won’t be changed on a whim, in order to extract money from those least able to afford it.

If politicians had a conscience, they wouldn’t lie to their constituents, and misrepresent the facts in an effort to gain a “win” for their Party at the expense of a “loss” when it comes to the best interests of their fellow citizens, and their country as a whole.

If military masterminds had a conscience, they wouldn’t condone torture, no less encourage its use or actively participate in its application.

If the current crop of so-called media “journalists” had a conscience, they wouldn’t regularly edit film footage, prattle on and on about non-news stories, nor ignore the truly important news items of the day in an ongoing effort to misinform the public they allegedly serve.

If the military strategists who opine on the necessity for war and oppression had a conscience, they couldn’t watch their own children sleeping peacefully while dismissing other children being maimed, mutilated, orphaned or killed as “collateral damage” and nothing more.

If the religious zealots who harass (or worse) those who don’t share their ideology – the gays and lesbians, the abortion-providers – had a conscience, they couldn’t demean their fellow men and women, and still delude themselves that are doing God’s work.

If the right-wing fanatics who host TV and radio shows that reach wide audiences had a conscience, they wouldn’t incite divisiveness and violence, and encourage the citizenry to see their fellow Americans as worthy of scorn – and the attendant consequences thereof.

This IS, as simplistic as it may sound, the bottom line, the effect directly resultant from an oh-so-obvious cause: it is the lack of a conscience that underlies our national woes, and will lead to continued untold suffering here at home, and throughout the world.

I don’t know where this trend started – this notion that not having a conscience was something to be strived-for, applauded, encouraged – and, in the end, hailed as some kind of enviable state of being.

What I do know is that until this trend is reversed, and those willing to stand up and say this cannot stand are treated as the heroes they are, instead of the rock-the-boat dissidents they are scorned as, we are in a shitload of trouble.

This may strike some as an inappropriate message on Thanksgiving. But I, for one, think this holiday is more than an appropriate time to speak up.

Today I more than thankful for the whistleblowers, the ordinary citizens who aren’t afraid to expose the wrong-doers in their midst – the honest employees, the watchful voters, the bloggers who seek out the truth, the website posters who expose corruption – those who have a conscience and are not only unashamed of it, but take pride in it.

I am grateful to all of you out there who raised your children to have a conscience, those who encourage your friends, coworkers, fellow Americans to see their sense of conscience as something to be flaunted rather than hidden, those who fight the good fight every day not because it is popular or in vogue, but because it is people of conscience who remain, simply by virtue of being who they are, the hope of the world.

As dire as I may sound, I am actually full of optimism tonight – because I know that those of good conscience will, in the end, prevail.

Hi, everyone! It’s me, NanceGreggs, live-blogging from the first Thanksgiving get-together – and what an event it’s turning out to be!

(First off, thanks to Sherman & Peabody Inc. for supplying the Wayback Machine, without the use of which this blog wouldn’t be possible.)

Right now I am on the Red Carpet, where a pre-pre-pre-surgery Joan Rivers is welcoming celebrity guests. “So, WHO are you wearing to tomorrow’s festivities?,” she asks – and admittedly it’s a question on everyone’s mind.

Dick Cheney was seen sporting a $456,712.56 bullet-proof vest designed by Halliburton, Laura Bush dazzled the throng with her suitable-for-future-White-House-drapes ensemble, while Ann Coulter claimed ignorance as to the designer of her umpteenth little black dress – although it apparently only comes in Size Minus 0 (IQ Minus 0 sold separately.)

Thanks to my DU-bestowed press credentials, I was able to have a sneak peek at the floats being prepared for tomorrow’s parade – and some of them are DUzy’s! While I am reluctant to spoil any surprises, I would just remind readers to watch out for the Get a Brain, Morans float, which features a Spellcheck application being ground into dust by a wood-chipper, and the FreepeR float – fully financed by parents who still have adult children living in the basements of their log cabins.

I also got a glimpse of the agenda for the Big Day. Apparently Lou Dobbs will be giving the “Welcome ALL – Uh, Except YOU” speech, George W. Bush will read a few selections from The Pet Goat as a lesson for future generation Americans on how to deal with an attack on their fledgling nation, and Joe Lieberman (D – DI – Watch-This-Space – whatever!) will drone speak about the importance of loyalty, depending on which way the political wind happens to be blowing.

Everyone is pitching-in to make this a day to remember: Michele Bachman is on security detail, ensuring that unwanted dinosaurs will not be allowed to disrupt dinner. Dr. Bill Frist will be monitoring the cooking spits via videotape – and hopefully will declare the turkeys dead and cooked to perfection at the appropriate moment. Rudy Giuliani is on-board as the self-appointed Man-of-Steel in Charge of Crisis Management (should one occur while the cameras are rolling - this offer void in future states where something called "trials" are permitted).

A few unfortunate incidents marred the pre-Thanksgiving celebrations: Senator John McCain was forcibly removed after yelling, “I want all of you Injuns off my lawn – now!” Sarah Palin (who can see the future Louisiana Purchase from her house) had to be stopped from field-dressing three dozen turkeys, when it was realized that at least thirty of them were fellow Republicans. Orly Taitz was expelled from the gathering after demanding that Native American attendees prove their “citizenship” by showing birth certificates, and copies of Michael Steele’s hand-penned newsletter, entitled “How, Kimosabe!”, was confiscated after being deemed not only inappropriate, but unlikely to garner many GOP registrants among long-standing local residents.

The media are out in force tonight, anxious to cover this historic event and enshrine its import for future generations. Larry King is doing a phone-in show, asking callers, “Whadda ya make o’ this Thanksgiving thing?” The FOX-News technicians are already editing footage from the signing of the Magna Carta to be passed off as crowds gathered to greet the arrival of visiting GOP dignitaries, and Wolf Blitzer is helpfully reminding his audience every thirty seconds that “America” was named after Amerigo Vespucci – while South America was named after his cousin, South Amerigo Vespucci. It is this kind of astute observation that will no doubt become the hallmark of journalistic excellence in the decades ahead.

Bloggers are also represented in large numbers. The Rude Pundit has already declared this just the fuckin’ first of many fuckin’ @#$! Thanksgiving celebrations, to be followed by other great fuckin’ @#$! celebrations in fuckin’ years to come. Some seedy character named EarlG is interviewing potential listees for The Top Ten Conservative Idiots, Volume I, Edition 1, Page 1, Post 1, Registration No. 000,000,001 – well, we’ll see where THAT goes. Will Pitt has left the bloggers’ area in utter disgust, vowing never to – oh, no, wait a sec – he’s back – oh, nevermind, he’s leaving again and – okay, more on that as the story unfolds.

What a thrill to meet the original DUers, who are also plentiful among the throng – Jamestown1, PlymouthRAWKS!, MayflowerMaddie, In-Before-The-FIRST-EVAH-Lock, aMaized&confused, bound2Btombstoned, Unwrecked – and Goody-Feel-Good (already a favorite among those who post in Ye Olde Lounge.)

(For those interested, I will be posting my interview with Here-Since-1621 on YouTube just as soon as someone invents a series of tubes and calls it the internetz – watch for it!)

Happy Thanksgiving to All!

--- Nance

Allow me to be direct and to-the-point.

We, the People, no longer wish to be associated with you – and you know who you are.

We are tired of trying to engage you in any meaningful discussion, because it is pointless. You have amply demonstrated that you are incapable of intelligent discourse. You contribute nothing of value to the conversation; ergo, you won’t be missed.

We are weary of trying to educate you, or prompt you to educate yourselves. You prefer to live in ignorance – a state in which you actually take pride. We have better things to do than listen to the mindlessness of your chatter, or those whose mindless chatter you parrot at every opportunity.

We no longer have any tolerance for your intolerance. We find your bigotry against those who speak differently, love differently, worship differently to be abhorrent. We find you abhorrent in that you not only cling to your prejudices, you encourage others to be just as distrustful of their fellow citizens as you have become.

We are beyond any desire to expend further time or effort trying to enlighten you, coax you, persuade you. You have chosen your side – and we have chosen ours. You have made it clear you will not be moved – neither will we.

You choose to support those who would tear this country apart, and distance one American from another. We choose to stand behind those who would unify it, and instil a sense of community.

You choose to threaten violence towards those who disagree with you, anxious for swift retribution against anyone who dares live their lives differently than you live yours. We choose to seek justice against those who have wronged us – the warmongers, the liars, the hypocrites, the torturers – and we have the patience and fortitude to see to it that justice prevails, no matter how long it takes.

You choose to hide behind the mockery you have made of Christianity, twisting it so as to excuse your inexcusable behavior towards your fellow man. We choose to embrace our fellow man and make his fight our fight – and know we are doing God’s work, the fact of our being Christians or otherwise being of no import whatsoever. We understand the concept of as you do to the least among you – a concept which seems to have escaped your attention, along with so many other ideals you might have learned from, had you taken them half as seriously as we do.

You choose to stand still, mired in the mud of your own self-inflicted stupidity, content to be led by-the-nose by useless loud-mouths so blatantly devoid of constructive thought. We choose to move forward, unfettered by the need to memorize talking points, inspired by each others quiet-but-determined sense of purpose.

We will continue to defend your right to speak, regardless of what you have to say. We just don’t want to hear it any longer – and we assert our right to walk away, distance ourselves from your prattle, and get on with the important things that need to be done.

We are The People. We are Democrats, Republicans, Independents, Greens. We are Christians, Jews, Buddhists, Muslims. We are liberal, conservative, progressive, middle-of-the-road – poor/wealthy, male/female, gay/straight, young/old, highly educated/barely educated, urban/suburban/rural dwellers who will continue to recognize each other and work together to ensure that people like you never exert any control over our nation.

Yes, we are a country divided. Sadly so. But we are no longer divided along the lines of political party, religious belief, sexual orientation, gender, race, ethnic origins or financial means.

We are divided between those who believe in equality for all, and those who believe they are somehow more equal than others; between those who are content to propagate lies and those who are restless in their pursuit of the truth; between those that take without regard for who goes without, and those who are determined that until no one goes without, nothing taken is truly earned nor deserved.

This is not only the way things are, this is the way things were meant to be. It was always going to come down to this: the ill-informed meanderings versus the facts-on-the-ground, the do-as-I-say versus the do-as-I-do, the Bible-thumpin' I've-got-mine versus those who are in fact thy brothers'-keepers.

The lines have been drawn. We all know where we stand.

So let the shunning begin.

Being the week of the official launch of Sarah Palin’s book, it is an opportune time to step back and analyze why this woman has attracted, although not unsurprisingly, the kind of scorn usually reserved for – well, for people who can’t put two coherent sentences together, but “write” books nonetheless.

Perhaps it is simply this: Sarah Palin personifies all that is wrong with a political system that allows for anyone so obviously incompetent to rise within its ranks, a political party so devoid of circumspection it would not merely allow such a person to come within a heartbeat of the presidency, but would actively support her pursuit of same, and a citizenry so bereft of insight so as to actually encourage and applaud her political aspirations.

The evidence is more than plentiful. Palin is as ill-informed as it is possible to be in today’s environment of easily-accessible information. She is an unethical hypocrite who lacks any empathy for her fellow citizens, who has often used her political clout as a means to destroy her perceived enemies and enrich herself financially, a woman who has no qualms about reducing her own children to mere props when it is politically expedient.

There is no doubt in this writer’s mind that Palin’s rise in popularity among the intellectually impaired was a natural follow-up to the G.W. Bush years, when the road to a form of political insanity was paved – a time when abject stupidity was passed off as down home charm, ignorance of world events was accepted as a sign of being just simple folk, and stubbornness and an incapacity to admit mistakes was lauded as strength of character and commitment to whatever the most recent poll results defined as American ideals.

But Palin, unbelievably it would seem, took up the torch of Olympian stupidity and not only ran with it, but managed to go the distance – not to the White House, but undeniably far beyond the fifteen minutes of fame usually relegated to those whose every utterance results in a self-inflicted slap-to-the-head and an incredulous cry of no, really, you’ve got to be fuckin’ kiddin’ me.

Even W, in his glory days, never went so far as to proffer the ability to see Russia from one’s front porch as experience in international affairs – perhaps a testament to his handlers who knew where to draw the line of incredulity; maybe just an opportunity missed due to never having attained the true maverickitude that would allow for making such outlandish statements and expecting them to be not only believed, but embraced.

Of course, W also lacked something that Sarah has in spades – her talent for playing the role of the persecuted victim, a part that is still deemed unacceptable for those of the male persuasion. In other words, if W had been endowed with Sarah’s tits, he could have persuaded a lot more of the populace that his detractors were not merely unpatriotic observers who pointed to his ineptitude, but die-hard conspirators out to silence the very voice of reasoned democracy – and, in the doing, sought to besmirch the good name of a fair maiden deserving of more genteel treatment. Simply put, W, by virtue of his gender, couldn’t play girl (although there are some of us who think he did a damned fine job trying), while Sarah d’Arc can throw herself on the pyre of persecution at a moment’s notice, and field dress a moose on her way to the conflagration.

Palin, to her credit – or the discredit of the loyalists who cling to her – never allows anything to stand in her way: not the truth, not the facts, not current events as they play themselves out, not history as it is known to have unfolded. Saucy Sarah simply creates her own reality – replete with things that never happened, or happened to the contrary of how she spins the tale – and smiles into the camera as her small-but-idolizing group of fans swoon to her rendition not of how things were or are, but how they are perceived in her own narrow little world.

Make no mistake. I come to bury Palin, not to praise her – nor even suggest that she deserves a modicum of sympathy or a minute’s respite from the well-deserved pilin’ on she is being subjected to.

As the personification of a political image created by half-truths and out-and-out lies, coupled with creative embellishment of questionable skills and accomplishments and ignorance that is not only blissful but a source of blatant pride – all neatly packaged in smoke-and-mirrors, a party-funded wardrobe, and presented to the world as the real deal – Sarah has come to represent all that is abhorrent in today’s political landscape, and deserves to be treated accordingly.

However, there is something truly pitiable about a woman whose claims-to-fame are, in the greater scheme of things, unremarkable at best – and, at worst, completely fabricated out of whole cloth. To hear her minions tell it, Sarah is the only woman to have given birth to a special-needs child, to have “dealt with” a teen-aged daughter’s pregnancy, to have smilingly survived the slings-and-arrows of a media that had the audacity to actually ask questions and expect a few answers.

To me, Sarah Palin is that guest at a dinner party who was invited only to balance the seating arrangements when it was realized that the party was one female short, and somehow convinced herself that she was wanted – that she was included because of her scintillating personality, her legendary wit, and her talent for initiating intelligent conversation.

Unfortunately for Sarah, she took these “truths” about herself to be self-evident, while the rest of the country, and the world, saw her for what she was – a shallow, vain, inept opportunist too wrapped up in her own ego to notice that she’d served her purpose the minute she accepted the GOP vice presidential nomination as the proud owner of a vagina – no further credentials necessary.

However, life being as full of irony as it often is, Sarah went on to become much more than the dumb broad from central casting, who played her role and caught the next train for her hometown, scrapbook in hand, ensconced in memories of a short-lived but much publicized cinematic career. She is now the face of everything the Republican Party wants us to forget its association with: right-wing religious extremists, lying hypocrites, ignorant-and-proud-of-it spokespeople who so obviously have less than nothing to say.

And.Now.She.Has.A.Book. And the media is eating it up with all the fervour reserved for other stories of equal substance – like an alleged boy allegedly set aloft in an alleged balloon.

All of this being said, I just want to add: “Congratulations on your new book, Sarah!”

I stand in awe of your ability to make a faux-silk, knock-off ‘designer’ purse out of the proverbial sow’s ear – and I applaud your contribution to the success of the Party – not yours, but mine.

You betcha!

I am at the point of looming insanity – and I admit it.

It’s not the alternate opinions from the other side – on everything from healthcare reform to the situation in Afghanistan – that’s givin’ me the booboojeebies. It’s The Stupid – the unbearable, smack-your-forehead, roll-on-the-floor in utter despair, oh-no-he-didn’t-say-THAT, tell-me-you’re-NOT-that-much-of-an-idiot type of Stupid, which seems to be contagious and is definitely now out of control.

I don’t know how much more I can take.

I would humbly propose – in the spirit of the upcoming God-damned, holier-than-anything, throw-the-Baby-Jesus-out-with-the-holy-water, “War on Christmas” season – we call a truce.

If you proudly ill-informed could just go to the Stupid faucet – or wherever it is from which your misinformation flows so abundantly – and turn it OFF, even temporarily, I would be eternally grateful (and so, if I may say so, would your country).

Oh, the joy to be had from a few weeks sans Stupid!

I keep imagining it – turning on the TV and NOT hearing Wolf Blitzer’s opinion about anything; tuning-in to any TV news broadcast without fear of staring into Michele Bachman’s vacuous eyes as she demonstrates her ignorance of all things.

And the spirit-freeing euphoria of – (oh, good God, I shouldn’t even go there, lest I pine for things beyond all imagining!) – NOT seeing someone use a blackboard or an oversized poster to demonstrate how a bunch of little boxes, with labels full of fine print that no one can read, prove Obama’s connection with a radical Muslin agenda, or the unsustainable bureaucracy of healthcare reform beyond all doubt.

It all seems like a dream to me now – and yet it is a vision I still dare to long for. The very concept of a weekend – a single weekend! – free of any quotes by, for, or about Sarah Palin is now the stuff orgasms are made of.

I ask for little – a handful of days in which not a single Medicare recipient is carrying a sign that says “Get the Gov’t OUT of my Healthcare”, a few precious weeks of LTTEs that don’t harken back to the good ol’ days when men and dinosaurs not only lived in peace and harmony, but often sold each other Tupperware products – perhaps (dare I hope?) even a senator who doesn’t read from the Declaration of Independence and insist he’s quoting the Constitution.

I realize that if a truce is to be effective, we here on the other side have to give tit-fot-tat (hopefully, in keeping with the situation, without someone literally making a federal case of the use of the word “tit”), and I have a few suggestions in that regard.

Give us ONE month without a performance by Orly Taitz & The Birthers, and we’ll suspend our propensity to nit-pick about proper spelling and grammar. Give us ONE week without Rush’s ramblings and we’ll give YOU a week without sporting our Birkenstocks (which, BTW, most of us wouldn’t be caught dead in, but we’re willing to go along to get along.)

Drop the phrase “homosexual agenda” from your vocabulary for six weeks, and we’ll STOP reminding you that you’re not on anyone’s radar screen – gay, straight, living and/or dead – as a potential sexual conquest.

In short, give us between now and the end of the year free of The Stupid, and we will – in all humility and generosity of spirit – stop pointing out how fuckin’ Stupid you actually are.

We’re not asking for a lot – a bit of common sense here, a dollop of actually looking at the facts there – it all adds up. And before you know it, the entire nation can enjoy a few precious weeks free of Teabaggers bitchin’ about being called by their own choice of name, never-been-laid (at least not without paying for it) religious fanatics who believe that homosexuality is an abomination because Jesus said so (even though he never actually did), and media whores opining on the opinions of political analysts who analyze poll numbers and statistics that emanate from a reliable source named Steve – who not only FaceBooks, but Twitters on a regular basis, just in case you thought his credentials were suspect.

Please understand that we don’t expect miracles here – just a respite from The Stupid. You are free to continue the usual displays of hypocrisy, along with the lies, deceit, and misrepresentations you’re now famous for. We’re not asking the leopard to change his spots – we’re simply imploring him to board-up the Stupid Well so that its waters cannot be drunk in the usual copious amounts.

This is a one-time, limited offer. Operators are standing by – AND, if you act now, we’ll throw in a bonus gift: Joe Lieberman (allegedly one of ours) will have his mouth duct-taped shut for the duration of the truce. I think that’s a concept we can ALL get behind.

Think about it – and run it past your Party Leaders. Ask them if you can suspend The Stupid long enough for the citizenry to at least remember what it was like to be somewhat sane.