Being as I have only been a lurker here and never an offishul member of this board, I have asked NanceGreggs to post my GBCW thread for me:

My RL name is Sarah Palin, and as some of you now know, today I resigned from my governorship of Alaska – because I love Alaska, and Alaskans, and all things Alaskanesque, along with the troops, and Trig, and General MacArthur, and everybody and everything that doesn’t get in my way, or on my last nerve, or can’t be shot and killed from a helicopter.

I have been maligned by you people from the beginning – those of you who don’t understand the weight of responsibility that rests on the shoulders of someone who may come off as a clueless airhead but is actually an honest-to-God, well-endowed woman trying to make her way in the world of politics, which has become a blood-sport and wastes the tax dollars of hard working Alaskans who deserve better, dontcha know, people who actually grasp the idea that Putin’s head is not just a figure of speech but a real threat to those of us who are outside that politics-as-usual thing that people like Katie Couric will never take to her bosom – and speaking of bosoms, I’ve got a pretty good pair and ain’t afraid to say so or show them off when my country is in need of a coupla of good-lookin’ tits wrapped in a coupla thousand-dollar-plus outfits, because it’s all about being who you are, just a regular soccer-hockey-baseball-basketball-whatever-sport-ya-like mom and playin’ it for all its worth.

I have been accused – here and elsewhere – of being an idiotic, ill-informed, unethical, narcissistic trollop, and I am used to the accusations because I have lived with them all my life, and I don’t understand why except that maybe it’s true, but shouldn’t that all be beside the point when my brother-in-law is out to get me back, and now there’s this thing with the house that my husband built with his own two hands in between snow machining and whatever else it is that he does, and doesn’t it count for anything that I went right ahead and used my own children as campaign props, and that Levi has some nerve, what with his drug-addled family and his pulling-out of my daughter’s life after she gave birth instead of pulling out when it would have done me some good.

I know the rumors are flying right now – about criminal investigations, and tax evasion, and embezzlement and God-only-knows-what, because I’ll be damned if I know – which may explain why I can’t articulate what I mean, or why I’m resigning, because I’ve made my position clear already and don’t ask me to repeat it.

I’m just a sweet Wasilla girl who don’t have time to read a newspaper or keep abreast (speaking of breasts – have you seen mine?) of whether a stop-over to refuel in Ireland counts as having been instrumental in pursuing an international agenda that embraces our traditional enemies – like the Irish, fr’instance.

You are no doubt going to be seeing all kinds of nasty stuff about me in the days to come, and if you are stupid enough to believe the facts over what I’ve been telling you for months, well, there ya go. That’s why people like me never get to be all we can be, or achieve all we are capable of doing, because people like you let facts get in the way of just saying, “Hey, what the f*ck, I’d rather have a VP who Tina Fey can impersonate than someone named Joe – who I can wink at and call by his first name – acting responsibly in office.”

In closing, I’d just like to say that you can spare me the don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out comments. I am not interested in what you think of me, or what the voters think of me. I am only interested in what I think of me, and I think I am FANTASTIC. How that attitude alone didn’t catapult me, along with the propaganda, into higher office is beyond me.

I may be down, but I ain’t out. Mark my words, DU.

Note from NanceGreggs: This woman is an idiot. What’s scary is not the FACT that she’s an idiot, but the fact that some people actually never noticed – and were willing to vote for her.

Nineteen pro-life House Democrats signed a letter last week to House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) expressing their opposition to any health care reform that includes abortion funding.

“We cannot support any health-care reform proposal unless it explicitly excludes abortion from the scope of any government-defined or subsidized health insurance plan,” the letter read.

The 19 representatives are:

Dan Boran (D-Okla.), Bart Stupak (D-Mich.), Colin Peterson (D-Minn..), Tim Holden (D-Pa.), Travis Childers (D-Miss.), Lincoln Davis (D-Tenn.), Heath Shuler (D-N.C.), Solomon Ortiz (D-TX), Mike Mclntyre (D-N.C.), Jerry Costello (D-Ill.), Gene Taylor (D-Miss.), James Oberstar (D-Minn.), Bobby Bright (D-Ala.), Steve Driehaus (D-Ohio), Marcy Kaptur (D-Ohio), Charlie Melancon (D-La.), John Murtha (D-Pa.), Paul Kanjorski (D-Pa.), and Kathleen Dahlkemper (D-Pa.).

Dear Nineteen:

You have NO right.

You have no right to tell me, nor any other woman in this country, how to live my life, how many children I may or may not have, nor how to conduct myself in the pursuit of limiting the size of my family as I see fit.

You have no right to limit, negotiate, or hold for ransom healthcare coverage from ANY American citizen for ANY reason. And the reasons you have set out – as personally sacrosanct, sincerely felt, and dearly held as they may be – have no place in the execution of your jobs as elected representatives.

Over twenty years ago, I had an abortion. I say that not with pride – but I say it without shame.

You might wonder why I chose to terminate a pregnancy. Well, you can wonder until the cows come home, because the truth is my reasons are none of your fuckin’ business.

If you find my choice of words obscene, so be it. I can only respond that I find your position on the topic obscene beyond all imagining. I based my choice – a choice that is guaranteed me by law – on criteria that affected myself and my family. You, on the other hand, are basing your choice to withhold support of vitally important healthcare reform, which will affect millions of Americans, on your personal beliefs, religious ideology, or a position that may or may not benefit you in being re-elected – hardly the kind of criteria an elected representative should be considering in the circumstances.

You have NO right.

You have NO right to dictate to others as to how they go about their lives.

You have NO right to use your office as a means of supplanting the will of your constituents with your own will, of substituting what is right for the many with your own sense of what is right for all – not according to the law, but according to you.

If you sincerely believe that you cannot, in good conscience, represent the best interests of those who elected you, when said interests go against what you personally believe to be ethical, moral, and right, there is a simple solution to your dilemma: resign.

Just DO it.

A teary-eyed photo-op, a heartfelt speech about how sad you are to be leaving office, a well-attended press conference full of statements about following your own conscience – yadda, yadda – will no doubt garner the sympathy of those who, like you, believe that healthcare for all Americans should come with strings attached, and that people like you should be in control of those strings, notwithstanding the consequences.

Just DO it.

I’d almost respect you if you did.

You would think that if you cheered your senator when he stated that the loser in an election should concede in the best interests of the people, and then he refused to concede when he lost, you would at least notice the self-serving hypocrisy.

You would think that if you heard a radio or TV personality constantly promoting hatred and violence against groups of people or individual fellow citizens, you would question their decency and love of country - and, every now and again, their sanity.

You would think that if your source of TV news was consistently broadcasting information that was totally inconsistent with the known facts, you would realize that you were being deliberately misled and misinformed.

You would think that if your representatives were against any policies that assisted the poverty-stricken, the homeless, or the sick, your oft-touted Christian values would be deeply offended by their adopting such a position.

You would think that if you learned your country had imprisoned, tortured and murdered innocent people, your sense of human decency would lead you to be outraged - and insistent that justice and accountability prevail.

You would think that if public figures were busily promoting the idea that the country is ripe for another attack, while blatantly highlighting that such an attack would serve to “prove them right”, you would question their patriotism.

You would think that if you condemned one politician for his immorality and another was caught doing the same thing, your reaction would be the same to both regardless of party affiliation.

You would think that given the fact that insurance company profits go up every time they refuse to pay the healthcare expenses of a policy-holder, you’d get the idea that we are living with a system where your health is not exactly a priority.

You would think that if your fellow citizens were left to sicken and die because they can’t afford healthcare insurance, it might occur to you that we obviously don’t have “the best healthcare system the world has ever known”.

You would think that if the worst attack on US soil occurred during a particular president’s term in office, and that same president left US citizens to die after a major natural disaster, the phrase “he kept America safe” would strike you as an insult to your intelligence – not to mention being downright laughable.

You would think that if someone told you that your heterosexual marriage would be in jeopardy if same-sex couples could also marry, your common sense would prompt you to ask them exactly how the fuck that works.

You would think that if your fellow citizen was being denied their equal rights for any reason, the whole concept of “equality for all” would so obviously be under siege.

You would think that if someone claiming to be pro-life murders an abortion provider, you might consider that person a tad less than concerned with the “sanctity of life” they keep railing about.

You would think that if a vice presidential candidate consistently displays her staggering stupidity, and ignorance of domestic and global matters, you might assess her as being less than qualified to hold any position of power and influence.

You would think that if a sitting vice president increased his personal wealth to a staggering degree due to a war he promoted and encouraged, you would question his motives – and his alleged patriotism.

You would think that if an administration sent our troops to fight, be wounded in, and die in a war based on lies, you might tend to wonder how truthful they have been about anything – then or now.

You would think that when members of PNAC predicted quick victory in Iraq, celebrations in the street, the “liberation” of a people, and were just as quickly proven wrong on every count, you might stop listening to their idiocy and recognize them as the dumbest fuckers in the room.

You would think that people would think.

But apparently, some of them don’t. Ever.

Those who can’t be bothered to think listen to drug-addled, violence-promoting, rightwing nuts with access to the airwaves – and let them do the thinking for them.

Those who refuse to think blindly follow the Judas Goats to the voting polls and the slaughterhouse, their own best interests and the interests of their country be damned.

Those who can’t think are called “the Republican base” - or what remains of it.

Those who DO think often disagree with their chosen party, their president, their elected representatives, and each other.

I think, therefore I am - a liberal Democrat.

Dear Barack:

First off, I hope you don’t mind me calling you by your first name. Thing is, you kind of invite that type of familiarity. And that’s a good thing. And you can call me “Nance”, just so we’re both on a level playing field here and all.

Now down to business.

“Yes, we can.” It was more than a great campaign slogan – it was a great concept. You didn’t tell us, the citizenry, that we were in a position to do incredible things. But you did remind us of that fact – and, as they say, not a moment too soon. Let’s face it – we, as a nation, were sorely in need of being reminded. And we collectively thank you for doing the remindin’.

That being said, I think – no, I KNOW, you’re smart enough to realize that once an idea like that takes hold, it also takes on a life of its own. There’s simply no stoppin’ it. You’re gonna get people all over the place saying, “Yes, we can,” and they’re gonna mean it when they say it. And when anyone – even you – looks to be standing in the way of what we can do, because we have determined that it needs to be done, you’re going to have to step to one side or get mowed down by the ball you started rolling.

The torturers – perfect case in point. They have brought shame on our country, endangered our national security and our standing in the world, and they don’t deserve to live among decent human beings. “Yes, we can” keep harping on the topic until they are arrested, tried, and sent to prison. And we won’t stop until justice prevails.

Healthcare reform – just try and stop us now. “Yes, we can” throw the greedy, profit-minded insurance companies OUT of the mix, and ensure that every American can sleep easy knowing they won’t be bankrupted by medical bills because their insurance premiums are destined for some CEO’s pocket rather than their life-saving treatment.

Equal rights for all Americans – including gay/lesbian Americans. “Yes, we can” continue to fight for equal rights, equal treatment, equal recognition of marriage under the law. Hearts and minds are changing quickly and drastically on this topic, and the law of the land will soon follow, whether the die-hard Fundies (who have no right to dictate the law based on their religious beliefs in the first instance) like it or not.

There’s a lot more to be said, Barack – but I think you get the picture.

Don’t get me wrong. I love the job you’re doing so far, and I know it’s not an easy row to hoe. I’m willing to be patient, and give you as much room as you may need in future to spread your wings and fly. You inherited a mess and I (for one) never expected you to fix everything that needs fixin’ on day one at the job.

But I just wanted to remind you that you’ve started something here, this “Yes, we can” thing, and we’re taking it seriously.

Now, I could be way off base here, but being the smart fella you have proven yourself to be, I think you always knew that we would take that ball and run with it. And we have. And we will continue to do so.

So you keep doing that presidentin’ thing you’re so good at – and we’ll keep doing that citizenry thing you’ve reminded us we can be so good at. And in the end, between us, we’ll set things right.

Thanks and all, and never forget that “Yes, we can.” And we will. You, me, and the other guy. Together.

--- Nance

First off, I hope you don’t mind my gushy, over-the-top salutation. I have found over the years that nothing attracts the attention of an egotistical idiot quite like perceived flattery – and, quite frankly, I knew you were ripe for the pickin’.

Secondly, I hope you don’t mind if I call you Dick from here on it, being as (a) it is a derivative of your given name, and (b) you are one.

So let’s get to the point, Dick, re your statement on Sunday, June 7, on the GOP Propaganda Network Fox-News, that a public option for health care would "be the first steps in the -- destroying the best health care system the world has ever known”:

If you were intelligent and informed (which, as we both know, you’re not) you would have looked at the stats and realized that “the best health care system in the world” is not likely to be affected by anything the US voters do – being as we don’t have, and never have had, anywhere close to the best health care system, even in our own hemisphere, no less the world.

I realize that as with everything, subjective rather objective opinions may come into play – so if you’re thinking along the lines of citizens going bankrupt over health care costs, or people dying as a result of being denied coverage by insurance companies as being “the best health care system”, I gotta give you right. If that’s your criteria, I won’t debate you.

The problem is, Dick, that the vast majority of the citizenry not only don’t accept such criteria as a measurement of victory in the “Best Of” category, they find it to be illogical, ridiculous, and preposterous – and consider those who promote such criteria to be reprehensible, disgusting, and downright despicable.

I understand that you are afflicted with GOPism (a degenerative disease whose first symptom is a loss of hearing, coupled with a complete inability to control what comes out of one’s mouth), so I’m going to explain this to you nice … and … slow. And don’t be ashamed to rely on a bevy of advisors and consultants to translate the following plain English into – well, uh, plain English.

Ever driven past an office tower occupied/owned/operated by a large insurance company, Dick – you know, one of those fancy-schamcy places that employs thousands of people, complete with all the accouterments of expensive artwork on the walls, to-die-for executive offices, and boardrooms whose decor just smacks of wealth and power?

Now, think … it … through, Dick. Who do you think is paying for all that? When those billions of dollars in health care insurance premiums roll in, who do you think is the priority – the old lady in Tucson who needs a hip replacement, or the bean-counter in the corner office who’s collecting the Big Bucks for finding a reason for denying her claim?

Think (I know it’s hard work, but try) about how IT MAKES FINANCIAL SENSE for a company that is working on a FOR-PROFIT BASIS and is looking out for the BOTTOM LINE is, shall we say, apt to find ways to deny valid claims for health coverage to millions of people who have paid for said coverage in order to INCREASE PROFITS and thereby SAVE THEIR OWN JOBS, and keep the CASH COW alive and well.

Let me try to put this in terms that even a Dick can understand: As long as every penny NOT spent on health care is a penny EARNED in profits, there is NO incentive for any health care insurer to choose the providing of HEALTH CARE over the lining of their own pockets.

Get it now?

Oh, probably not. Because you are, after all, a Dick of the first order.

As you said, “Because government -- when the government's involved more and more in the details, and you start the one pay deal, and you've got the government competing with private enterprise, with all the incentives government has and the power, they will destroy the marketplace for health care, and it will be a mistake, and the American people better be careful in what they want.”

To which I can only reply: If the government’s involvement in “details” is so detrimental to any enterprise, why is that same “government” allowed to wage war, oversee vast military operations the world over, decide on where money will be spent, how much, where and when?

As for the American people being careful of what they want, Dick, I think we can agree they spoke very loudly and precisely in the last election. And what they don’t want is another asshole like yourself telling them they’ve got “the best health care system the world has ever known” when they know the difference between shit and Shinola – a difference you might want to acquaint yourself with in the days to come.

Now, I don't want to get into your personal space about your own medical afflictions, but I can tell you for a fact that if you want to seek medical help for that GOPism thing you're dealing with, your own medical insurance is not likely to cover it, due to its categorization as a "pre-existing condition that requires extensive and expensive long-term treatment, said condition being one the insured could have avoided via use of easily-accessible symptom reducers such as intelligence, facts, statistics, and common sense."

Gotta tell ya, that's ONE diagnosis I'd have to get behind.

Dick.

If you don’t believe in a woman’s right to choose, you are not pro-life, you are anti-choice.

If you believe a woman should be forced to carry a child full-term, regardless of the circumstances she finds herself in, or the quality of life that child would be subject to once brought into the world, you are not merely anti-choice, you are anti-life.

If you think any woman’s dominion over her own body is subject to the whims, religious beliefs, or alleged “morals” of others, you are anti-equality.

If you are arrogant enough to hold that your God, your religion, your church’s doctrine should be foisted on others, whether they adhere to the same doctrine or not, you are laughable in the eyes of whatever god it is you think you worship and revere.

If you decry abortion but cling to capital punishment, unprovoked war, the use of torture, or the justification of death in any form, you are not pro-life in any sense of the word – you are pro-hypocrisy.

If you assert that your opinion on the topic of abortion, whether based on your religious beliefs or your political bent, is somehow superior to all other opinions and should be deferred to by everyone, you are not pro-life for all, you are pro-ME – and just how arrogant is THAT?

It has not escaped my attention, nor that of the citizenry of our country, that the same people who maintain that adoption is always a viable option think homosexual couples should not be allowed to adopt – pro-child? No, anti-child – because if you would deny the love and care a same-sex couple would happily bestow, you are denying love to a child desperately in want and need of it - something you vociferously advocate, as long as it is your idea of suitable love and care, the child's needs suddenly being of lesser importance.

It has also not escaped my attention, nor that of the people of the world, that while the alleged pro-life crowd talks a good game when it comes to women being forced to birth unwanted children, children born into poverty are dismissed out-of-hand as the offspring of “welfare queens”, and are automatically perceived as undeserving of basic needs – like nutritious meals, an education, and medical care that comes at the expense of tax dollars.

The very people who brag about their pro-life position are the same people, more often than not, who get their respective knickers in a twist over things like sex education and the use of contraception. They’re not anti-awareness, they are pro-ignorance – and the consequences of that position be damned.

Words are powerful tools; they can often sway the opinions of others, influence political policy, change attitudes, correct misconceptions (pun very much intended).

But when words are deliberately mis-used, one can’t help but wonder at the weakness of the underpinnings of arguments that must inevitably rely on said mis-use, misinterpretation, misappropriation of phrases meant to misdirect, misinform, disengage.

Finally, when a group touting themselves as pro-life lauds the death of someone – anyone – whose views or beliefs are different than their own, whose life was dedicated to the quality of life a pregnant woman considered in terms of an unborn, as-yet-unfulfilled life that she chose to terminate – for reasons that should be personal and left forever unquestioned – the abject stupidity, hypocrisy, and lack of morals of said group should be put on public display as often as possible - and, in this case, as necessary as is warranted to get the truth out there, as opposed to the "talking points" of those who DO nothing but talk.

Pro-life means just THAT – pro-choice, pro-education, pro-meaningful-options, pro-caring for every child born, not just those born into families with the financial means to care for them, or the emotional wherewithal to deal with their birth into our society as it IS, and not what some wish to PRETEND it is.

Every child a wanted child. Every child a cared-for child. Every child a coddled, looked-after child with every opportunity before them, as well as before their parents, nothing withheld, nothing denied – nothing predicated on the “good intentions” of those who say that a child should be brought into the world regardless of prospects, then squawk like stuck pigs when their tax dollars are involved. Nothing reliant on those who grab the megaphone outside an abortion-provider’s clinic and rant about the sanctity of life, who then slink off in their “good Christian silence” when said provider is left in a pool of their own blood.

Pro-life? No, pro-death – and like it or not, that IS the name of that tune.

Rest in eternal peace, Dr. Tiller. Your principles will not go unnoticed, your song will not go unsung, and your true compassion for others will never be forgotten.

If you’ve ever wondered how the now almost-defunct Republican party has ever been able to get any of their ilk voted into any office above the position of dog-catcher, one need only look at their traditional constituents: the Stupid.

Unfortunately, The Stupid have been with us a long time and the GOP, recognizing their numbers and their penchant for being riled-up enough to get out and vote, took advantage of – well, people Stupid enough to be taken advantage of.

For decades, The Stupid have been coddled and catered to – made to feel that Abject Stupidity is a virtue, something to be admired and aspired to. Just give The Stupid a completely unreasonable reason to feel somehow superior to the elitists who do things like read books, inform themselves, get an education – and you’re going to wind up with people who not only vote against their own best interests, they’ll even drag their canines to the polls to vote for a dog-catcher running on the platform of “the only Good dog is a Dead dog”.

Such has been the insidious nature of the Republican agenda, where “I’m With Stupid” isn’t just a silly T-shirt, but the slogan of an entire political party.

Appreciating that The Stupid are easily led, the Republican party has never failed to capture their attention and hold them to its teat like a suckling infant – only to remind them that something as natural as milk-filled teats are the work of the devil, never meant to be proffered in the first instance. That’s cause the Bible tells ‘em so – the same Bible that embraces torture, condones corporate greed, and provides the underpinnings to support the concept that “turning the other cheek” actually means “nuke ‘em if they disagree”.

Of course, The Stupid have needed to be kept stupid, which means a mainstream media that caters to the lowest common denominator – i.e. “Stupid is as Stupid sees on the nightly news” – lest an actual fact get through here and there, upsetting the Stupidity apple-cart.

And then there are the “made to order” talking heads – Hannity, Limbaugh, O’Reilly, Malkin – who cater to The Stupid with a fervor that flies in the face of things like journalistic integrity (hey, remember THAT?) and simply tells The Stupid what they want to hear: You’re not out of work due to outsourcing, you’re out of work due to those illegal aliens sneaking over the Mexican border in the dead of night who are showing up as CEOs of major corporations the next morning, and deciding that your job is expendable. Sorry if you can’t take a joke – and the punchline is hysterical in the original Mexicanish.

But there’s something the GOP, in all of its finite wisdom, didn’t count on: the smartening up of the American citizenry.

They never saw it coming. Never planned for the fact that people would actually notice that the country was plunged into debt before Barack Obama (D) took office, that their jobs disappeared under a G.W. Bush (R) administration, that the much-touted cooperation of foreign nations in fighting the “War on Terra” would be better served by an administration that garnered world respect rather then global guffaws, that democracy doesn’t fare well when secrecy and lies supplant transparency of government and from-the-hip honesty – that a president who strives to find solutions rather than create more problems might be just what the citizenry ordered.

Yes, my friends, much to the chagrin of the GOP, The Stupid are smartening up. They’re beginning to realize that flag-pins worn in the lapel don’t equal patriotism, that ”Support the Troops” bumperstickers don’t address the problems faced by their back-from-Iraq military neighbors, that universal healthcare actually makes sense, that CEOs pulling in seven-digit incomes while the employees of their corporations struggle to make ends meet is not representative of a healthy capitalist society, that raping defenceless women and children is not business-as-usual in wartime – and that, most importantly, the people who encourage all of the above are not on their side.

It was bound to happen, sooner or later. The Stupid would, despite the best efforts of the GOP and the MSM, eventually get smart. They would inevitably realize that what they were being told and what they were seeing with their own eyes and ears were two totally different things.

It’s a sad day for the Republican Party (who many of us will someday remind our grandchildren was a political force that existed, once-upon-a-time.)

But it’s a great day for America – a little damaged, a little tattered, a little worse for wear – but on its way to bigger and better things, now that The Stupid are a vanishing breed.

... What I Stand for Matters Not"
By Nance Greggs

(This is a repost from last fall. I think it bears repeating tonight.)

I wear a ring, a gift from my husband. It is inscribed in Hebrew with a quote from the Songs of Solomon: “I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine.”

It’s a simple statement, but it is one my beloved and I are free to declare – publicly and openly, without fear of ridicule or derision. That freedom of expression is not based on our commitment to one another – it is based on the fact that we are a man and a woman.

I consider myself a tolerant person, one who truly makes an effort to understand the viewpoint of others – even when their staunchly held opinion vastly differs from my own.

But on one topic in particular, I have failed miserably in trying to understand – or be tolerant of – the distaste and distrust, the baseless paranoia, and the incredible narrowness of mind that refuses to recognize that love knows no boundaries – nor was it ever meant to.

If we have one common destiny as human beings, surely it is to constantly strive for a more perfect world. And I can’t help but wonder how we can pretend to perfect ourselves in a world where love must be hidden for appearance’s sake, relegated to something “done” behind closed doors, or denied altogether because it is socially unacceptable.

To those who are currently living without the rights they so obviously deserve, I will not deign to say, “I know how you feel.” Because I can’t possibly know.

Never having been there, I can’t know what it’s like to worry about being denied a death-bed visitation with the person I’ve spent my life with. I cannot know how it feels to long to hold a child in my arms while resigning myself to the fact that the care I would give so freely is deemed unworthy by those who do not know me, and never will.

I cannot know what it’s like to restrain myself from spontaneously throwing my arms around the one I love for fear we are in the wrong place, doing the wrong thing, and might suffer dire consequences for actions that come as naturally to us as they do lovers everywhere, and have since the beginning of time.

What matters now, more than ever, is this: If I do not stand with my gay and lesbian brothers and sisters, everything I have ever believed in falls away. If I am not willing to fight their fight, I am woefully inadequate to fight at all. If I am not ready to do what is necessary to make things right for them, I have no right to believe that anything will ever be truly right for me.

I realize how easy it is to ask for patience, when I am not the one called upon to be patient. I appreciate how unspeakably glib it sounds to say your time is coming, when my time has already arrived. I am cognizant of how condescending it may seem to preach tolerance of the very people who have shown no tolerance at all. And if and when I am guilty of any or all of the above, I humbly beg your pardon.

Simply put, you are my beloveds, and I am yours.

And if I ever waver in my commitment to you or your cause, remind me that if I don’t stand with you, I don’t deserve to stand at all.

After reading the many opinions posted today, here and elsewhere, about the release/non-release of photographs evidencing torture, I find myself longing to live in the black-and-white world that is seemingly inhabited by many – that place where every issue is a matter of being one-hundred-percent right or wrong, devoid of any shade of gray, where doing the right thing is obvious, and consequences need never be considered.

Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how one sees these things), I dwell in the real world, where little is as cut-and-dry as one would hope; where shadows tend to intrude on sunny scenarios, blurring the lines between light and dark, prompting inconvenient things like doubt, and a necessity to weigh and measure actions against the reactions they may cause.

I have seen opinions delivered as absolutes: Everyone already knows what we did, complete transparency means no exceptions, the pursuit of justice should never be weighed against the consequences of said pursuit – let the chips fall where they may.

I have also seen logic tortured into becoming complete nonsense: Supressing photographs of torture is tantamount to condoning it, considering the consequences of their widespread release is just an excuse to protect the guilty – and the truly astounding concept that any opinion expressed against releasing these photos is equivalent to declaring that “everything Bush did is okay with you.”

In truth, saying that “everyone already knows what we did” is the assertion of a fact not in evidence. Undoubtedly there are those who know what was done. But there are also those who do not know the true nature of it, nor the extent of it. To say that “everybody knows” the details of what went on is like saying everybody knows that the re-election of G.W. Bush to a second term was fraught with voting irregularities, when we ALL know that many people – regardless of access to the information readily available from various sources – actually know no such thing.

And of course the belief that everybody already knows begs the question: If everybody DOES already know, why is it necessary to reiterate what is already known?

Most fair-minded, justice-seeking people would argue that “transparency” should never be qualified nor negotiated – and yet those same people would never debate that rape-shield laws, where a lack of transparency (i.e. the withholding of names and certain information) is deemed not merely acceptable, but necessary in recognition of the greater good.

I have seen the opinion expressed that withholding these photographs from the public view is simply a matter of trading the public’s right-to-know in exchange for a little bit of security. One wonders if those whose loved ones are currently in the Middle East would consider the possible backlash of violence against their children a matter of “a little bit” of security.

All of this is to say one thing, and it is my opinion only: On this particular issue of the release of these photographs, we should all accept that this is a case – if ever there was one – of being able to respectfully agree to disagree.

There IS no absolute answer here. For every valid argument there is to withhold these photos from public view, there is an equally valid argument for releasing them. There are consequences to either decision, and what those consequences might be are, at this point, a matter of speculation at best.

Let’s remember that the Biblical tale of Solomon, real or imagined, was told in hindsight, and in light of an innocent babe being returned to its loving, rightful mother. Would we have heard this story, and revered it as a sign of incredible insight into true justice being served, had the child been cut in half, its bloody remains delivered equally to both claimants?

Of course not.

Where do I personally stand on this issue? At present, I stand on both sides. I understand the need to acknowledge the guilt of what was done in our country’s name. I also appreciate the necessity of weighing and measuring the impact of the possible aftermath on innocents who may be targeted as representative of our government’s transgressions, and those who might be prompted to violence in retaliation for our many sins – a violence that may end in their own destruction and death.

That may be perceived by some as sitting on the fence. I perceive it as an acknowledgment that I am not privy to all of the facts that surround this issue and, as a result, my position on that fence is not a matter of indifference, but a result of having to defer to those who know more than I do.

I wish I had the Wisdom of Solomon, the legendary elder of old who knew that things would end as they should, who knew, without hesitation or second-guessing, that justice would triumph in the end and the consequences thereof would be heralded for centuries as a shining example of having done the right thing, concluding in a suitably happy ending for all concerned.

It’s comforting to imagine this movie fading to black – but those pesky shades of gray, whether you like them, accept them, acknowledge them, or ignore them – are still there, clouding the screen as the credits roll.

I do not purport to have the Wisdom of Solomon. Neither does Barack Obama. And neither, in my humble opinion, should any one of you.

To speak in absolutes – this is what WILL happen, this is what the consequences WILL be, this is what WILL ensue in the aftermath – is arrogantly ignorant at best and, at its worst, a foolhardy foray into an uncertain future that may lead to consequences no one wants to live with in the decades to come.

Whether I personally agree with President Obama’s ultimate stance on this issue is neither here nor there. I knew going into his election, and my support thereof, that he would do things I agreed with, as well as things I disagreed with strongly. And that wasn’t prescience; it was simply common sense. The only person I will ever agree with one hundred percent of the time is myself – and last time I looked, I was not elected to the highest office in the land.

For the past eight years, many of us have railed against the “cowboy mentality” of Bush and his supporters – those who felt that acting first and considering the consequences of those actions after-the-fact was the way to run a nation.

I, for one, am grateful that we now have a President who considers all options, who listens to all arguments, who thinks ahead – and ultimately acts accordingly. And while I may disagree with his final decisions, I am confident that those decisions are the result of having assessed information that undoubtedly weighs heavily on the heart and mind.

There is something to be said for the idea – nay, the ideal – that reasonable people can disagree without dismissing the concerns of those who take a different view, that two well-meaning individuals, given the same set of known facts, can come to completely different conclusions as to the best course of action on a go-forward basis.

I am not advocating taking one position or another. What I am advocating is the respect we should be showing one another in the face of a complex question that – despite the extremists on both sides who know everything – truly has no simple answer.

RE Your current poll question: “Do you like seeing the president as Jokester-in-Chief?”

I realize you are looking for a quick yes or no answer – but that’s not going to stop me from responding in full and complete sentences (a concept you have become unused to, but might want to check out).

My “quick” answer is NO, I didn’t like seeing the so-called president act like a buffoon during the eight years of the Bush administration.

But apparently, you did – because no one kissed the Idiot-in-Chief’s ass more than the MSM talking hair-dos, your own so notably among them.

But I digress. The topic is (allegedly) the citizenry’s appreciation of having a president with a sense of humor. And Barack Obama has one. He is smart, witty, charming, and doesn’t shy away from being self-deprecating. He takes his job seriously, while viewing his own self-importance as something worthy of a punch-line.

Now, let’s discuss what isn’t funny, shall we?

It isn’t funny when a not-so-duly elected “president” declares that he has a mandate from the electorate to do whatever the fuck he pleases, despite the consequences to individual citizens, or our nation as a whole.

It isn’t funny when a lazy, draft-dodging, good-for-nothin’ jerk sends US troops into combat, ill-equipped and ill-advised, and winds up being plastered all over the airwaves as a Mission Accomplished hero, landing on an aircraft carrier for the ultimate photo-op that you and your ilk couldn’t resist showing time and again.

It isn’t funny when the leader of what was once the greatest nation on the face of the earth heh-hehs himself into the Guinness Book of World Records as the Buffoon-of-All-Times, while so-called “TV journalists” fawn over his every put food on your family remark as being a pearl of wisdom.

It isn’t funny when US troops are going into battle without basics like body armor or clean water to bathe in, while Mr. Plastic Turkey is hailed by some “news outlets” (not mentioning names here, but psst … the initials are C-N-N.) as being a man who understands the plight of the soldier, far from home on a holiday.

It isn’t funny when hard-working, middle class Americans wake up to find their savings wiped out, their homes about to be foreclosed on, and their jobs gone as a direct result of the previous administration, while so-called “journalists” yammer on and on about whether the current president is "funny enough" to suit everyone’s liking.

And what is really, truly, seriously NOT funny at all is a “news network” asking a question about a Jokester-in-Chief after President Obama’s stellar performance last night, when that same network never posed such a question, nor commented upon, the inane remarks and/or policies of the Chimp-in-Chief who plunged our country into unfathomable debt, vacationed while a US city drowned, appointed political cronies to positions of power, brought scorn upon a once-proud nation, and acted like a clueless idiot from the first day in office to the last.

Suggestion for the next CNN Quick Poll: "What do you think is funnier: (a) Tens of thousands of people dead as the result of the Worst.President.Ever. running things, OR, (b) Tens of thousands of people dead as a result of the so-called “news media” asking dumb poll questions of the viewers instead of asking pertinent questions of those in power?”

Oh, and please remember to add as an option: (c) The whole idea of CNN being a legitimate source of news is SO FUNNY, I forgot to laugh.

Recipes include …

Basic Outsauce

Gather necessary ingredients.
Ship to cheap labor market.
Wait four-to-six weeks for prepared sauce to arrive in mail.
Return to sender – out-of-work folks can’t afford shipping and handling.

Outsauce with a Twist

Find one (1) covert CIA agent.
“Out” her when her husband starts “talking saucy”.

We-Don’t-Torture Turkey Surprise

Torture one turkey (farm fresh or plastic) to death.
Roast – as – slowly – as – possible.
Regale dinner guests with tales about what info the turkey gave up before expiring – which, of course, can't be disclosed, but kept America safe


Cheney Chicken

Shoot chicken in face.
Wait for chicken to apologize.
Grunt-like-a-pig while devouring.


Halliburton Halibut

Sautee rotten fish in fetid water.
Charge your dinner guests $2,500 per serving to cover “costs”.
Serve on jewel-encrusted “KBR” plates.

Gitmo Gumbo

Rack-of-lamb with assorted vegetables.
Remove from rack before serving – insist lamb died of “natural causes”.
Recipe serves 15 to 20 non-persons.

Pro-Life Omelette

Fry thousands of eggs.
Add salt, pepper, mushrooms and onions.
Serve while discussing how you would have supported social programs to care for all of those baby chicks, if only they’d been allowed to live to maturity.


Bipartisanship Buffet

Beat-and-batter one newly-elected president.
Place on skewer.
Season-to-taste with bitter herbs.

Fox-News Frappe

Toss mixed nuts, fear and paranoia into blender.
Whip into a frenzy.
Recipe serves (1,000,000+) idiots and/or (0) thinkers.

Christian Values Salad

Assorted fresh-and-impressionable greens.
Discard all parts thereof that appear to be gay, lesbian, pro-choice, pro-science, pro-freedom-of-thought, rational, and/or intelligent
Say Grace before swallowing consuming

Tax-and-Spend Tea

Run up billions on credit card to purchase ingredients.
Combine ignorance and forgetfulness with healthy dollops of revisionist history.
Position mis-spelled place cards at each guest’s table setting, in hopes no one will notice you don’t know what the fuck it is you’re steaming about.


NeoCon Newburg

Ingredients: one (1) fresh lobster
Problem: can’t afford lobster
Solution: find lobster that promises to pay for itself

MSM Appetizer

Assemble “virtual” food on platter
“Dress” with hair-dos, designer wardrobe, industrial-strength cosmetics and LOTS of vinegar
Serve with arrogance - pass-off as substantial and satisfying fare.

Palin Half-Baked Alaska

Combine brainlessness, scandal, hypocrisy.
Add assorted clueless quotes.
Bake in oven until over-done.

BushCo Brunch

Strategerize food preparation.
Don’t misunderestimate number of guests.
Proceed to put food on your family.

Being as you right-wingers have demonstrated your lack of maturity time and again, I thought I’d try to explain things to you as though you were back in high school – which, mentally, most of you still are.

When the student body elects a new president of the Student Council, dissin’ him every chance you get doesn’t change the fact of his election. And when you get into passing notes in gym class about what a great guy the last president was (the one you supported for years, who finally graduated when he should have been expelled), you might want to actually remember what that president’s policies were, and what he did to the school as a whole.

For example, talking trash about the new guy raising the price of textbooks when he is actually lowering them just makes you look, uh, dumb – especially when it was your guy who blew the school budget, which led to the potential need for the price of textbooks to be raised in the first place.

What you seem to be willing to protest now in the school parking lot seems to be the same thing you didn’t protest then, and attributing your guy’s failings to the new guy is a perfect example of “projection” – something you’d learn about in Psych 101 in college, if any of you had the grades to get into college. Which you don’t, but there you have it. (And BTW, your English teachers are dyin’ over here, what with the bad grammar and mis-spellings on your placards and all.)

It’s a given – everybody wants to sit at one of the cool tables in the cafeteria. But if you choose to eat lunch with nutcases like Glenny Beck and Michelle “If I Only Had a Brain” Bachman, don’t get all snotty when the really cool kids treat you like nerds, and laugh at you in the hall.

Let’s keep certain things in mind – like the fact that your legendary Student Council small-P “pResident” introduced that “Mission Accomplished” theme for the prom – the one only you uncool kids attended – and insisted that the wearing of costumes would actually suffice for real leadership. And then there was that please-just-kill-me-now moment when the DJ-for-hire started playing that “Boot Up Your Ass, It’s the School Way” crapola – way uncool.

Oh, and here’s a thought: Sometimes the Student Council prez shakes hands and jokes around with the Student Council prezes of other schools – ya know, being courteous and sportsman-like and all. It happens, and it’s all good – unlike the times your “pRez” played cowboy, all hat and no cattle – or, as the Honors students prefer to put it, all smirk and no brains. And so far, the new SC prez has yet to embarrass the entire student body by trying to give a back massage to any of the female SC prezes from other school districts. Thank God for small miracles, huh?

You might also want to remember, as you’re yukkin’ it up in science class (yeah, actual science, not that Creationist/Flintstones man-rode-dinosaurs-to-work “science”), that the Abstinence-Only Sex-Ed course has been cancelled – due to the number of students who had to drop out because of impending childbirth. (Under-the-bleachers rumor has it that the new and improved sex-ed course will include definitions of phrases like "teabaggin", so you might want to show up and learn something.)

And while you’re attempting to chew gum and talk at the same time, you might want to pass along the info that a “grassroots” initiative starts with a bunch of students spontaneously taking over the PA system during an assembly, as opposed to being organized by a bunch of out-of-work teachers who have an axe to grind – and want you to grind it for them.

Now, I don’t want to get all you-guys-are-hypocrites on ya and all (okay, I DO), but you might want to quit bitchin’ in front of your lockers long enough to acknowledge that the new SC prez has been going steady with the same chick all through HS, and no under-aged, gimme-a-drink-anyway teenagers were harmed in the making of this administration – nor were they trotted out as being the product of a good ‘n’ moral Christian upbringing ™.

This new prez is trying to make things right, trying to undo the damage your guy did for the eight years it took him to get out of high school (it would have been way more years than that, if his parents weren’t at every PTA meeting naggin’ about how poorly their little chimp son had been treated by those meanies at the Board of Edumacation, not to mention civics class and the Real American Patriots Club.)

Oh, and just a word to the unwise (or the illiterate who can’t read the latest school newsletter), the Drama Club will no longer be participating in “acting out” bogus Bin Laden threats, and the Art Club is unanimous in their ixnay-on-the-somewhere-in-the-desert-sets-and-props projects – just so’s ya know.

As for the “unofficial” but nonetheless recognized Bullies Club that sprang up during your guy’s Student Council “presidency”, don’t be surprised if the International Board of Education starts sending out truant officers to collect their butts and throw ‘em in juvie hall pending investigations into their activities. Forewarned is fore-poutraged, and we wouldn’t want you to miss the point – as you have a penchant for doing.

So as we gather together to start a new school year, I just want to remind you that you’re OUT and we’re IN – and BTW, not only are you out-and-out nerds, your mother, who looks and sounds uncannily like Rush Limbaugh, dresses you funny - especially when she puts teabags on your hat.

They are men of small stature. Not meaning short in height, nor slight in frame – just small, diminutive, easily lost in the shadows – easily overlooked.

They are men of little virtue. They espouse good Christian values when it is socially expected, or politically expedient. But in the night, they slink and slither, and blend into the dankness of decay – easily invisible.

They are men of legalities. They hold themselves out as ethical followers of the letters of the law. But they search for the loophole, the technicality that will exonerate them, the route by which they can circumvent true justice – easily immune.

They are men of insignificance. That is why they must wield the power of pain – always someone else’s, never theirs. They enjoy the suffering, because they are cowards, because they are impotent and flaccid – easily dismissed.

They are men of incompetence. Their only talent is getting the job done, the “job” invariably being something so totally abhorrent, men of ambition and a sense of their dollar worth wash their hands of it, Pilate-like, early in the game – easily blameless.

They are all the same. They are torturers.

They are high and low, they are politicians and pencil-pushers, they are surveyors and purveyors, they are fast-talking ad men and smooth-talking madmen, they are professional excuse-makers and amateur finger-pointers, and all-around, get ‘em while they’re hot, totally fucked-up, disgrace-to-the-human-race, barbarians.

They are all the same. They are torturers.

To all of you torturers out there who this may reach, be of good cheer. You may yet escape the rightful punishment that you so richly deserve. But if you have one scintilla of humanity left within you, the guilt, the shame, the moral emptiness you live with every day is a far worse punishment than we, your fellow citizens, could ever mete out.

Here’s the deal. If you can’t/won’t confess your actions publicly as a crime against everything we, the American People, stand for and aspire to, confess to your own family. Explain, in vivid detail, what you did, ordered, approved, signed-off on, did the paperwork for and/or turned a blind eye to to your idealistic teen-aged son, or your sweet-and-innocent grand-daughter.

Look in their eyes as you make you excuses, as you describe the torment you helped inflict on someone’s child, someone’s parent, someone’s neighbor, someone’s best friend.

Watch them closely – they will judge you, and you will be devastated by their verdict. And their disgust is, for you, a life sentence.

Hope your participation seems worthwhile now.

Torturer.

No doubt you have now been convinced, the vast dozens of you, by FOX-News and various and sundry other purveyors of the non-truth, that yesterday’s non-event was an event that rocked the world.

Ergo (oh, for Christ’s sake, Google the word, why don’t you?) you will be planning non-events for the future.

Please consider the following Tips for Teabaggers:

· Change your name. Considering the connotation of teabagging, you might want to – no, uh, nevermind. Stick with teabaggers – it’s just too


· Try to find out what is it you are allegedly protesting before you participate. Chances are (being as there are so few of you) you will wind up in front of a TV camera at some point, being asked why you are there. Responses like “duh”, “I dunno”, and “beats me” do little to advance your cause – whatever that cause may be.

· Pulling off the grassroots movement thing means NOT making references to FOX-News or corporate sponsors of your non-event. It’s kind of like telling a chick you just met in a bar that you’re single and sexually insatiable – despite the fact that you’re wearing a wedding ring, and your BlackBerry keeps flashing a message about picking up some extra-strength Viagra on your way home.

· Placards and signs will be captured by TV and still cameras. Spelling and grammar come into play here – no, seriesly. Don’t be afraid to ask a neighbor for help in bringing properly-spelled words together into a coherent sentence. If you have a Liberal neighbor, he/she is probably your best bet when looking for someone with expertise in this area. (They may not agree with your political views, but they will defend to the death your right to mis-spell them.)

· A little fact-checking goes a long way. It’s always wise to make sure you’re not protesting what you think a new administration is about to do, when it turns out to be the same thing the previous administration (the one you supported so vehemently) actually did do for … eight … fuckin’ … years. “This Obama guy is about to plunge the nation into unfathomable debt – oh, noes!!!

· The clothes make the man/woman. Wearing a hatful of teabags will (a) demonstrate your idiocy for all the world to see, and (b) ensure that you never get laid again – at least not by anyone who isn’t just itchin’ to fuck an idiot.

· Stay mindful of those Good Christian Family Values ™ you’re always braggin’ about, especially while you’re out in public. Your seven-year-old with the “Don’t touch my piggy-bank” sign is adorable – why isn’t she in school? Oh, that’s right, schools are evil, what with being funded by tax dollars and all – just like those tax-dollar-funded firefighters who are on their way to your house, trying to save it as it burns to the ground while you’re out rantin’, wearing a hatful of teabags.

· Find a fact (yes, an actual fact] and commit it to memory (yes, at this point, a single fact will do) – that’s one more fact than you had in your empty head yesterday, and it might come in handy in future.

· If you find yourself in possession of a single fact, you might not want to participate in “teabagging” in future – and I’d suggest the first fact you look into is the definition of the word “teabagging”.

· But that’s just me …

Once in a great while, I am reminded of the magic – the magic that exists within us all, that life-force that sometimes – albeit shyly, and humbly – picks up the bat, steps up to the plate, and knocks the ball out of the park, not because it needed to or wanted to, but because it was destined to do so all along.

A woman named Susan Boyle – who some would describe (and dismiss) as a frumpy, unattractive-but-endearingly-ditzy, not-ready-for-prime-time player, dominated YouTube this week with a clip of her incredible performance on “Britain’s Got Talent”.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

Many will dismiss this post as sentimental clap-trap – and there was a time when I would have been first among their ranks.

But there is something of the spirit of things here – something that speaks of the hope of at last being recognized for what one has to offer, and the change that takes place within our hearts and minds when we ignore the stereotype and welcome the voice of a fellow world citizen – a voice that thrills us with its clarity and beauty.

We, as human beings, are capable of war, destruction, torture, the starvation of children, the ability to turn a blind eye to the suffering of millions while decrying the inconvenience of the few.

And yet we have, in the midst of the din of chaos, created this nonsensical thing called music – and have, perhaps inadvertently and sometimes reluctantly, come to appreciate its ability to bring us together.

Perhaps there is hope for us yet.

I think so.

I hope so.

Okay – I know so.

Ever the optimist.

--- Nance



(A special shout-out to fellow DUer, RonnyKMarshall, for turning me on to all of this – and then some.)