It is oft said that recognizing a problem is the first step in overcoming it.

Apparently, I have a problem – and although I still don’t see it as such myself, I am constantly reminded by others that it exists. I don’t know if that counts, but I am willing to explore the possibility.

My problem seems to be that even though I am a female, I don’t support Hillary Clinton.

I have been told, countless times, that this means I am (a) a self-loathing woman, who is (b) jealous of Hillary’s many accomplishments, that I (c) don’t appreciate the fact that if Hillary loses the nomination there will never be another female candidate for the presidency, (d) I am a blatant sexist, who (e) just generally doesn’t understand that independent, free-thinking feminists should dutifully dispense with things like independent free thought and simply put their support behind the woman candidate whether they think she is qualified or not.

I have tried to reconcile this kind of mindset with my own sense of independence, and try as I might, I cannot seem to adapt to the notion that if I base my support for a candidate on gender alone I am somehow advancing the cause of women’s rights or equality between the sexes, or engaging in some kind of convoluted self-preservation of not only my own womanhood, but everyone else’s.

I admit that if Hillary was championing women’s rights while her Democratic opponent, Obama, was advocating an overturn of Roe v Wade or the 19th Amendment, I might have a different view of things. But she’s not, and he’s not – so where gender comes into play here is, alas, beyond my comprehension.

But to hear the Hillary camp tell the tale, truly liberated women are those willing to abandon their independent thoughts and support “one of their own” in a nomination process that, according to them, isn’t a matter of candidate v candidate, but a matter of boy v girl.

The true feminist – again from the “Bible According to the HRC Camp” – is she who steadfastly resists the temptation to look behind the rhetoric, scrutinize policies, investigate positions with a view to determining whether they agree or disagree, and simply puts her full support behind the candidate who possesses the same genitalia.

I guess I’m just confused. I’d always thought that being an equal-and-independent woman meant determining my own course, and putting my support behind a candidate based on my own criteria, and not someone else’s – male or female. But now I am constantly berated for doing just that.

Apparently, I am not supposed to blindly follow the dictates of males – but I am supposed to blindly follow the dictates of fellow females, and do so without question.

I guess I’m just not getting it. I’m not getting the idea that although I am independent, I am duty-bound to depend on the opinion of others who happen to share my gender. I’m not getting the concept that I have to ignore my own beliefs and unquestioningly adhere to the beliefs of a handful of fellow women. I’m not getting the notion that if I put aside my own thoughts and embrace the thought processes of others I am thereby liberated.

Like I said, I have a problem – or so I am told. I just can’t shake this crazy idea that I, as a woman, am free to support whomever I deem to be the most qualified candidate, regardless of their gender. And I just can’t fathom how that sensibility equates to an admission that I am under the yoke of male supremacy.

In any event, despite my problem, I still support Barack Obama. I guess that makes me, in some quarters, a stiff-necked, obstinate woman, one who will obviously never learn her place as determined by the so-called feminists who have taken it upon themselves to dictate exactly what my place should be.