Apparently some of them won’t be, as their parents prevent them from attending school for a day rather than risk exposure to a speech by the President of the United States on the topic of education.

Well, you can’t be too careful. As one shining light of the GOP once put it, “A mind is a terrible thing to lose” – and encouraging kids to stay in school and get a good education could mean losing them as Republican voters in future.

In some respects, I can understand the concerns of people who are honestly looking out for their kiddies’ wellbeing.

Despite the best efforts of many parents to shield their children from the horrors of a certain event, some of them may have seen video footage or photographs of G.W. Bush sitting in a classroom, reading The Pet Goat on 9-11. One can imagine the déjà vu-invoked trauma these kids might experience – fearing that this might be yet another time when a president interacting with students will end with him sitting there doing nothing while their nation is under attack.

There is also the real fear that if their lil’ darlin’s take education seriously at the President’s behest, they might grow up to be “elitists” who know how to spell, punctuate, and speak English properly – could even go so far as to read a book now and again.

Imagine the embarrassment of these parents in later years, unable to plaster bumperstickers on their fenders that read “Proud of my high school drop-out!”, or, “My kids are Patriots – that’s why they don’t listen to no stinkin’ President!” The mind boggles.

Also to be considered is the uncomfortable questions some moms and dads would face should their children make that oh-so-obvious comparison: “Hey, mommy, how come this president makes sense when he talks, and the ‘nother one sounded like an idiot?”

Of course, it could also go the other way, which would delight the parents who extolled the virtues of Bush for the past eight years: “Mommy, this president isn’t funny like the last one – he hasn’t tried to open a door the wrong way even once!”

For many well-meaning moms and pops, the greatest fear is fear of the unknown. While they know that Obama’s speech has been designed to address the topic of the value of education, there is always the possibility that he might “slip up” and mention that the Earth is not flat, and actually revolves around the Sun - rather than vice versa. Now there’s something no self-respecting parent wants to have to explain at the dinner table.

The rumors are rampant – and, as usual, are as ridiculous as stories about death squads and an all-out effort by the Democrats to guillotine poor ol’ granny in the town square as an example to those who don’t adopt Muslinism.

According to some of the fair and balanced persuasion, Obama will be speaking to our youngsters about healthcare reform and homosexuality. I, for one, am not putting it past him – I’ve heard he’s also including a PowerPoint presentation on the intricacies of determining gross national product, along with a three-hour lecture on the successes and failures of the nation’s foreign policy in the Middle East from 1793 to the present day. But then, it’s only rumor.

And then there’s the obvious – the truth that many parents have tried to keep from being absorbed by impressionable young minds: the President of the United States IS black. And once they see him up on that TV screen – well, there’s no going back, is there?

Amidst all of the nonsense being spewed by the rightwing, my personal favorite is the concept that “the opposition” should have a right to present a counter argument after Obama’s speech – although I must admit that actually hearing the “opposition” talking points to staying in school and getting an education would undoubtedly be the best entertainment available since – well, probably since Sarah Palin described being able to see Russia from her house as constituting experience in foreign affairs.

And exactly who are these stalwart parents so eager to protect their offspring from the words of a duly-elected POTUS? They’re the same parents who had no problem exposing their kids to the intellectual genius who spoke about the importance of putting food on your family, who candidly broached the subject of doctors being able to practice love with their female patients, the Christian role model who embraced torture – the modern-day philosopher who once dazzled the edumacated world with his observation that, “Yeah, China is big, too.”

These are the people who will steadfastly refuse to allow their precious poppets to be exposed to subversive, un-American ideas like allowing an education to open their minds to the possibilities in life, setting goals in their school years and striving to achieve them, adopting habits like the self-discipline of study that might prove useful in their adult years – the same people who are attending teabagging events even as we speak, carrying signs that declare they are not socialtists and want English to be declared the ofical languge of their beloved country.

If you’ve ever wondered where the Republican base of the future will come from, I’d advise you to take down the names of the students who won’t be allowed to listen to Obama’s address next week – because those are the same names you’ll see on GOP voting rolls in future.

Where will all of this insanity wind up? Well, we all remember what it was like when WE were kids – the minute our parents told us not to listen to something, we were in the schoolyard the next day, asking those who were allowed, or managed to eavesdrop, what was said. Of course the kids nowadays don’t have to resort to second-hand schoolyard hearsay – they have the internetz.

I predict that the YouTube posts of Obama’s speech are going to be very popular, because nothing has the allure of the forbidden – and nothing resonates in an impressionable young mind like the very words he was warned not to heed.