As an Ex-Breeder, myself, I think that a shift in one's sexuality is certainly possible. I can't honestly say that I was entirely pretending or hiding all those years. There WAS genuine attraction to the women that I dated and eventually married. But time and events brought a shift in things, and... This is where I am now, and I am OK with it (better than OK, in fact!). But I wasn't "recruited" to the gay world, as many Fundies would probably suggest- I found it all on my own, and had been curious about it ever since puberty. If there are any attempts at recruiting going on, it's all of the organizations and websites promoting "Ex-Gay" services and counseling. These folks clearly prey on gay people who are at odds with themselves, their families, their churches, etc...

I don't know anybody who was "healed" by such an organization, but I did know one man who became ex-gay. He had grown children when he came out, and he lived as a gay man for almost 10 years. And when I say lived, I mean he ***LIVED***, baby!!! Let's just say that he was a wild one that just immersed himself in all things gay and he seemed to be good with it. When his dad passed away, he began to change. He spent a LOT of time with his family (natural- after the death of your father) who were largely pretty religious. One day, out of the blue, he calls me to say that he couldn't live the gay life anymore. He was selling his house, quitting his job, and moving to the small town where his brother lived. When I pressed him for a reason, he just simply said that he now believed that it was "wrong" for him be gay. That was about it- he didn't try to convert me or say that I was on the road to hell or anything like that. He just hung up, and I haven't heard from him since. I hope he's well and happy with his new life. I'll never know whether or not he was "recruited" to the ex-gay fold, or whether it was a personal choice that he made all on his own, but I guess it doesn't matter too much.

So all this to say- I think there can be, and IS a presence of truly ex-gay people out there. But I don't pay much heed to the ones who are actively out there PROMOTING becoming ex-gay. Just like I can't convince a straight guy to come to the other side, neither can they convince me to come back to THEIR side- It's gotta come from within!

I have so much mail to go through, and other crap to do... but I am starting to go through the pics:

Just got on the boat, about 2 hours of sleep. But making the best of it...


The first party- Mellow-Yellow T-Dance (as opposed to TeaBag Party):


A post-sunrise pic from our balcony:


The rock formations at Cabo San Lucas:


Another view of the rocks:


View of our ship from Lover's Beach- Cabo San Lucas:


S/O and I in front of the Pacific (2nd time in my life to be near the Pacific):


Skipping a few days, the sunset in Puerto Vallarta:


Finally, on the last night- We meet the legendary Debbie Reynolds. A spry one, at 77 years old:


More later, perhaps- I've got a lot of laundry to do...

Though I can't say it's been all smooth-sailing, somehow I've managed to make it to the 5K mark.

So first off, Many thanks to all of you who gave me advice (some encouraging, some brutally frank) in the past. These past few years have been something of a wild ride and I can't say thanks enough for having a place to post my thoughts and problems, and hear many diverse opinions about them. A few of you (you know who you are) really went above and beyond, and I couldn't possibly love and cherish you any more!

Next, to those I have had conflicting opinions with- No harm, no foul. We all have our differences and opinions, and that's what makes life interesting. I certainly hold no grudges, and believe with all my heart that despite the little differences, we all can learn something from each other.

A very special thanks to the GLBT contingent. Having come out fairly late in life, I've learned much from the online discourse. We've all had different experiences that have shaped who we have become, but we're still "family" and I'm proud to be amongst you!

Thanks for all of the laugh out loud moments in the Lounge! Whether it be thinly-veiled sex threads, call-outs to fantastic GD mayhem ( ), lame copycat threads, Chuggo, threads that never die, Olive Garden Breastfeeding- hell, even those damn NARWHALS- it's entertainment that you just can't find ANYWHERE else.

Thanks to all of the Admins and current/past mods. It's a thankless job, and you sure as hell can't please everyone.

All the best to each and every one of you....

(not sure if this has ever been posted, but it's worth repeating)



The article is subdivided into the following premises:

1. Most people have not carefully and prayerfully researched the biblical texts often used to condemn God's lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender children.

2. Historically, people's misinterpretation of the Bible has left a trail of suffering, bloodshed, and death.

3. We must be open to new truth from Scripture.

4. The Bible is a book about God -- not a book about human sexuality.

5. We miss what these passages say about God when we spend so much time debating what they say about sex.

6. The biblical authors are silent about homosexual orientation as we know it today. They neither approve it nor condemn it.

7. Although the prophets, Jesus, and other biblical authors say nothing about homosexual orientation as we understand it today, they are clear about one thing: As we search for truth, we are to "love one another."

8. Whatever some people believe the Bible says about homosexuality, they must not use that belief to deny homosexuals their basic civil rights. To discriminate against sexual or gender minorities is unjust and un-American.

Full article is at the link.

Yeah, I lurk at FR occaisonally for entertainment purposes... For the life of me, I don't understand how they can possibly be complaining that the Republican party has become too liberal, and that's why they lost in November. Yet, this seems to be their stance and war cry... How they need to kick out all of the RINOs and do a complete housecleaning (no doubt led by OxyContin-Rush).

But it makes no sense!!!!! I don't even think that the stupidest of Freeper could argue that the population of the US, plotted from super-ultra-liberal to absolute-freak-ass-holy-roller, would end up as a bell-shaped curve. Most of us are somewhere in the middle 50%, though perhaps leaning one way or the other. The extremes and/or straight party voters of each end simply don't decide the fate of any elections- it's the MODERATES that end up being persuaded one way or the other.

So what? Do they think that staunch conservatives, disillusioned by what they call "moderate republican" politicians, are SO pissed off that they're voting democratic? Seriously? How high do you have to be to reach that conclusion???? Even with all of the fighting amongst democrats re Obama vs Hillary, I have yet to speak to a Hillary supporter who was SO mad that Obama got the nomination that they voted for McCain (probably, there are some out there, but they'd surely be a rare breed).

So am I oversimplifying? Why do they seem to REALLY and TRULY think that their problem is one of being TOO moderate? I personally know dozens of republicans who are swinging the other way, because (and I'll use a quote from my former-republican Dad here) "The republicans have been hijacked by the Christian Taliban- ALL they care about is abortion, gays, stem cells, and creationism. BushCo can screw everything up, just so long as those issues are being handled to their liking."

I suppose it's just their way of licking their wounds (telling themselves it's true so much that they start to actually believe it). But it still dumbfounds me!

Yeah, it's the Hallmark-Holiday we all love to hate...

But ain't love funny? It can come in so many forms and go in so many directions. For some of us, what seems so perfect and natural draws such venom and ire from complete strangers. Love comes easy for some of us (who often remark about how easier it would be to stay single), yet not so much for others, who remark that all they want is someone to call their own. Some of us find that "one true love" and have it snatched away by forces beyond our control. Some of us cling to a tumultuous relationship, while others bail at the first sign of trouble. Sometimes a failed relationship makes a second visit- one that can be a blessing or a curse (or both). It's all so confusing. At best, love conquers all; at worst, it can seem to destroy all, too.

Yet, sometimes a simple song becomes the least common denominator- distilling all of the crap that countless couples have been through into a few chords and words. Often it means different things to different people, but somehow it still fits.

So in that vein- honor your significant other with a cheesy love song that fits your relationship. Or, post a song that says what you'd want in a relationship. Or, how about a song that tells of a love that wasn't meant to be? Or any of the above and something altogether different- it's a free country (at last)!

So in honor of my significant other- PolarBear (you know who you are).... I was glad to see 2008 and all of the trials that it brought come to an end. Things are very different for us now, but moving in a direction towards something that can be more stable over the long term. Perhaps one day we'll be able to understand why things evolved as they did- but for now, just know that you mean the world to me (even at the times when I need to be alone). I love you dearly, Mr. Bear- and this cheesy love song is for you!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XENujsU3Wg

It's a sub-article from my local lifestyle magazine. The author was using wood from hurricane Gustav to make his own charcoal for outdoor cooking.

http://www.225batonrouge.com/news/2009/jan... /

Early 1970's Yamaha Acoustic... Mostly retired.


Ovation 1778T Elite Acoustic-Electric...


Fender Tex-Mex Strat... (This was one helluva buy- great strat tone, for not much $$)


Dean Avalanche HS (This was bought for use as a prop, and the pickguard covered in crystal rhinestones. Surprisingly, it is a pretty decent guitar that really draws attention)


Epiphone '57 Les Paul Junior reissue (P100 removed and replaced with a P90. All the bang, MUCH less buck than the Gibbie equivalent)


1971 Martin D12-35... (A craigslist find. Currently in the shop for a bridge replacement, and installation of an LR Baggs transducer)


1966 Fender Bassman, with small 2x12 cabinet... (Tubes and capacitors replaced- other than that, all original. Loud as all hell.)


Fender Pro Junior... (Not a bad little amp- I've done some small mods to mine, and it has a great basic R&R tone)


Line 6 Pod X3... (Just purchased it- It seems to be a decent piece of equipment. No, it has no glowing glass but if you want a range of sounds it surely fits the bill)

I like the new CC, but for $35K.... I'll keep putting around in the VW I already have!

A few hours ago, I did a Google search for an image to insert into another board that I frequent. The topic had evolved into flying cars, and why don't we have them yet. Predictably, The Jetson's came to my mind and I had a stupid comment to share that I thought would be aided by a quick picture of The Jetsons in their flying car.

I keep my Google image results unfiltered; I'm no prude, and that's just how I roll. But I was not prepared for the images that "Jetsons" as a search term results in. El-Roy banging his mom, George doing Judy, Mr. Spacely doing Judy, various robots doing Jane AND Judy (while El-Roy watched), ASTRO (Freakin ASTRO, man....).... well.... I can't get into that. What has been seen, can not be UNseen.....

Is there really that much sexual interest in The Jetsons? Similar searches of other beloved cartoons of my youth (Scooby Doo, Johnny Quest, Josie and the Pussycats, Speed Buggy, etc) turned up maybe a handfull of images combined.

So in closing- the PSA is: "Do not do a Google image search of your favorite cartoon characters, unless you are mentally prepared to see them "en flagrante delicto."

Thank you, and have a super-duper evening. Me? I have to go bleach my retinas.

This is a roundabout response to the Gay Demographics thread.... This is also something of a revisit to a lot of my journey to where I am now, personally, and my $0.02 on a lot of what's been happening lately. Read it if you want, skip it if you prefer- or just put me on ignore, if you must.

I was home the other night kind of doing some PC maintenance- cleaning up and deleting old links, etc. I joined gay dot com some time ago, but quickly discovered that it was mostly ads, junk, and chatting with people who either want to hook up for a quickie (not really my thing) or have cyber-sex (also not my thing- but dif'rent strokes!).

Anyhoo- a quick browse of some local profiles revealed plenty of people I know (or at least know of). But then I start seeing the profiles marked as "married but curious" or something similar. Really and truly- I think they equaled or outnumbered the number of "normal" profiles. And this isn't the only website where this phenomenon is seen, either. Of course, having once been married myself I very much understand being in that boat.

While I was married, I (like many others) felt like I was alone in my confusion and depression. During this time, if someone had asked me my orientation (even anonymously), I more than likely would have said straight. I would say that the reason for my answer would be a combination of factors, including but not limited to the stigma of an alternate sexuality, the desire to be "normal," and the fact that up until the last months of my marriage, I had never acted upon my "forbidden desires." Call it denial, call it lying to myself, call it lying to others- the end result is the same. I absolutely have regrets about the path I took, and feel that it was unfair to my wife to be put through all of this (though she was surely not blameless, but that's a story for another day). All things considered, I think my situation and response was not atypical, meaning that most people who are busy deceiving themselves and others would probably not give an honest answer if they were questioned as to their sexuality.

So how are all of these "curious" types counted in an attempt to determine the percentage of Gay or Lesbian folks within a population? Would they even tell the truth if asked? Is it fair to lump them in with the gay group? Many, many questions here- and if those being questioned aren't honest.... Well, obviously the survey results won't be worth the paper it's written on.

As flawed as it is, I do believe in the Kinsey sliding scale. My marriage to my wife was NOT a total sham- I did love her very much at the time and if I were totally honest with myself at the time, I would have realized that in those times I was probably bi. The events of a bitter and spiteful divorce pushed me more to the gay side of the scale, where I remain. This is not to say that I hate women, or a woman drove me to be gay. It's just that my sexuality was somewhat less-than-cemented into place and I was vulnerable or open to change by forces beyond my control.

My final thought is just this: I don't care if I'm one of 50%, one of 5%, one of 0.5% or even one of 0.000000000005%. I'm a person- no more, and no less- and a citizen of the US and deserve to be seen as an equal under the eyes of the law. I don't give a crap what your church, your pastor, your mother, your grandmother, your husband's brother's former roommate's massage therapist, etc... thinks of me, and neither should the government. All of the infighting among us ("us" meaning dems in general, and the GLBTQ constituency specifically), quite frankly, depresses the hell out of me. I've made posts that agree 99.99% with the OP, only to have said OP come back and want to fight and be snarky over the 0.01%. In a word, it's ridiculous. This is NOT the road to progress in GLBTQ rights; we have been officially derailed. And the saddest part is that so many posters here seem to be OK with that (hell, even basking in it).

edited for clarity

A Lotus Elise would be high on my list. Totally unpractical vehicle, but as I hear it's a near perfect aggressive driving machine.

That said, if I could afford such a car, then perhaps I could also afford a custom paint job to personalize it and make it stand out from a crowd. I think the owner of this car may have gone a few steps beyond that, however:



Bass boat glitter with a top coat of hue changing gloss.... Epic.

A 1971 Martin D12-35.

I've been wanting a good acoustic 12-string for some time, and this one popped up on craigs list for pretty cheap. It needs a neck reset and a bridge replacement, but not altogether unexpected for the age and nature. Strung her up last night with new strings and it has a great tone!

Well, I'm closing in on having owned this car for a year... Unfortunately, she's not as far along as I'd like, but progress HAS been made.

The convertible top... That was an ordeal. Took a while for the upholstery shop to get all of the parts, and when they took the old material off, there was a fair amount of rust and bending of the frame. They were able to fix everything though, and the end result looks fantastic. The top, padding, and headlining material is all new.

Engine... I've really not done much other than regular oil changes and valve adjustments. I'm playing it safe and having the valves adjusted with every oil change (they suggest every 5000 miles, but I'm really not driving the car that much). There are 132K-ish original miles on the car, and some have said that the engine may be approaching the end of it's life. But the previous owner had a complete top-end engine overhaul performed- all new heads and seals installed, so I think it will be good for a while. It continues to purr like a kitten! Oh, and it does remain fuel-injected- no conversion to carbs, and I plan to keep it that way.

Tranny... I'm planning to have the transmission overhauled in the next month or 2. There is some popping out of 3rd (that they claim is due to a worn bushing, but to get to the bushing, the tranny has to be removed so at that point- might as well overhaul it). I've set aside the funds for that.

Interior... All I've really done is cleaned it up and put some temporary covers and padding into the front seats so she can be driven comfortably. I've pulled back the carpet and vinyl, and it looks as if I may be able to bypass any floor-pan work. The rust is minimal. I plan to clean and treat the rust spots and make a couple of small patches and re-inforcements. I've purchased some dampening materials (second skin) and will one day tear out everything and replace. I'm not going to go completely stock, as the black vinyl is just not practical in Louisiana heat. I will be installing a tweed interior, in a mixture of charcoal and black.

That's the high points- lots of other odds and ends to work on, too.

Needed to document them all, so here's a few pics: