It is being reported that the wife of the first cousin of Reverend Wright is a hateful and despicable woman. She has screamed epithets in public about the "white devils" that have kept her down all her life. She has used "honky" several times in embarrassing situations, including once in the same church that the Reverend is pastor.

Reverend Wright said he did not associate himself with his cousin's wife's comments but that he would not keep her from attending church. A new Gallup poll shows that 25% of the public is very "disturbed" by the Reverend's refusal to denounce his cousin's wife.

In the same poll, 28% of the public were "disturbed" that Barack Obama refused to disassociate himself from the wife of the cousin of Reverend Wright. It is unknown what impact this will have on Obama's candidacy for the Presidency. Most people said they were "disturbed" that Obama would attend a church where the word "honky" was used so readily. They wondered why he would not just get up and walk out?

In a statement today, the Obama campaign said this controversy was started by the sister of the wife of the first cousin of Reverend Wright. A spokesman said she was "one mean b****" (a word that rhymes with rich). In a sidenote to this breaking story, the husband of the sister of the wife of the first cousin of the Reverend was arrested today for DUI on the back streets of a Chicago neighborhood that is known for its crime and drug-dealing.