Latest Threads
Latest
Greatest Threads
Greatest
Lobby
Lobby
Journals
Journals
Search
Search
Options
Options
Help
Help
Login
Login
Home » Discuss » Journals » meegbear » Read entry Donate to DU
Advertise Liberally! The Liberal Blog Advertising Network
Advertise on more than 70 progressive blogs!
meegbear's Journal
Posted by meegbear in General Discussion (1/22-2007 thru 12/14/2010)
Tue Sep 02nd 2008, 02:26 PM
Let us pause for a moment to think about Bristol Palin's 17 year-old vagina. Don't worry, fellas and gals. The age of consent in Alaska is 16, so not only can you think away, but you don't have to worry that 18 year-old Levi Johnston raped her statutorily. Already the governor's daughter, Bristol Palin and her vagina were thrust into a national spotlight thanks to the pure beauty queen/newscaster stupidity of her mother, Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin, and the McCain campaign, which seems to act more like an agitated old man with Alzheimer's than the actual agitated old man the campaign is for. So as we think about Bristol Palin's vagina and the obvious activity it has experienced, remember that we did not ask for her vagina to be shoved in our faces.

First off, how much of a fucking idiot do you have to be to even allow yourself to be a national nominee if your high school senior daughter is pregnant? Sarah Palin, whose frightening 1980s head shot looks like every white girl the Rude Pundit ever fucked in college, believed that her personal ambitions were more important than Bristol's vagina when Bristol's vagina should have come first.

When it was announced that the teenager had decided "on her own" that she would keep the baby, evangelicals masturbated at the idea of Bristol Palin's vagina, which was possibly roughed-up by Levi's stumbling fingers before he fucked her for a couple of seconds, depositing his sperm-rich semen into Bristol. The Family Research Council released a statement praising Bristol for "choosing life in the midst of a difficult situation."

What the fuck's all this shit about "decisions" and "choice"? The point of the pro-life movement is that there ought to be no choice available. High school hockey player with douchebag whiskers knocks your daughter up? She's having that fucking baby. Because if there was ever a moment where there was a choice, that makes her goddamned pro-choice.

So, really, was there ever a discussion, at any point? Did Bristol Palin ever get to say, "Papa Don't Preach"-style, "I'm keepin' my baby?" 'Cause, see, that seems at odds with the goals of Feminists for Life, of which Sarah is a proud member.

Bristol Palin's vagina, which may or may not be topped by a tuft of pubic hair shaved in various shapes, is important to our national discourse for obvious reasons. Her vagina, however tight or loose it may be, reveals how degraded conservative moral beliefs actually are, as if we needed any more evidence that abstinence education is a complete failure, even from one's parents, that teenagers wanna fuck and are gonna fuck no matter how much you threaten disease, babies, or the stink-eye of Jesus.

But, at the end of the day, the fact that we are discussing Bristol Palin's vagina means that the John McCain campaign is effectively over. Not because of the fact of the vagina, but because of the fact that John McCain probably gave more consideration and background checking to the servants at his and Cindy's houses. He has fucked the goat. Even if, as some are suggesting, he's gonna try to take a mulligan on the decision and re-boot to Lieberman, well, if one gets that 3 a.m. call for a crisis, one had better make the right decision by 3:01.

http://rudepundit.blogspot.com/
Discuss (96 comments) | Recommend (+18 votes)
Profile Information
meegbear
Click to send private message to this author Click to view this author's profile Click to add this author to your buddy list Click to add this author to your ignore list
24105 posts
Member since 2002
Greatest Threads
The ten most recommended threads posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums in the last 24 hours.
My Forums
Democratic Underground forums and groups from my "My Forums" list.
Visitor Tools
Use the tools below to keep track of updates to this Journal.
Random Journal
Random Journal
 
Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals  |  Campaigns  |  Links  |  Store  |  Donate
About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy
Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.